Soaring Over Stress, Episode Twelve ~ Hijacked Amygdala

Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Soaring Over Stress, an SOS for navigating stress and anxiety in the workplace. As always and forever and ever, I'm your host, Aimee Ray, and today we're going to be talking about the hijacked amygdala. Now I know in a separate episode we had also talked about the hijacked amygdala, but I want to add some more to it. I was recently asked in an interview, what do you do when you're stressed at work? I sat there wondering the same. Here I am, a podcast creator and hopefully soon public speaker on the very subject. My response to her question was to freeze. What do I do in these circumstances? Do I even apply the tools, the tips and techniques that I teach others? Well, yes and no. You see, in my previous jobs I did. I would work on stage one, the egg. I would practice diaphragmatic breathing. I would utilize stage three, the fledgling, where I would use my body to create poems or draw or even scribble to connect the amygdala to the prefrontal cortex. Sometimes I utilize stage five, havening, to calm my body and mind. These days I tend to just freeze. I can't leave a classroom full of students and the ones that would watch the class are more often than not the ones triggering my stress response to begin with. So I sat there in the interview and all I could say was, I breathe. But is breathing enough? It might have to be in those moments under those circumstances. I wonder if sometimes my breathing is less diaphragmatic, less healing, less a coping mechanism and more akin to holding my breath. What if I am merely stuck in freeze mode? I noticed last week my amygdala was being hijacked yet again. For reasons I don't quite understand, all but one of my students have decided it is hilarious not to listen to me. Not only not listen, but to be outright devious and defiant. The moment I tell a few of them not to do something, another one is egging them on to do it. I began using a stern voice, an eye that I hoped conveyed that this isn't a joke. But I was still the punchline and I was beginning to flatline in my heart. I was trying to find solutions in real time, as several of them climbed shelves or on top of a stack of cots that are way too high for them to be climbing on. Think, Amy, think. But I could feel my amygdala being flooded by pain that produced anger. I love these kids so much. I am dedicated to making them feel safe, treasured, seen, and loved and valued. But somehow, they don't get it. I don't know, maybe they're all vying for one-on-one attention that I clearly can't give a full class all at the same time. Regardless, I need to find a way to address the class. I think I might have. But then again, there's my amygdala. I've been recently reading the book, The Mountain Is You by Brianna Weist. And I came across a section called limited emotional processing skills. And I thought this was really good. And I wanted to share it with you now. In life, there's going to be people, situations and circumstances that are upsetting, infuriating, saddening, and enraging. There will likewise be people, situations and circumstances that are inspiring, hopeful, helpful, and truly offer purpose and meaning in your life. When you are only able to process half your emotions, you stunt yourself. You start going out of your way to avoid any possible situations that could bring up something frustrating or uncomfortable, because you have no tools to be able to handle the feeling. This means that you start avoiding the very risks and actions that would ultimately change your life for the better. In addition, an inability to process your emotions means you get stuck with them. You sit and dwell on your anger and sadness, because you don't know how to make it go away. When you can only process half of your emotions, you ultimately only live half of your life, half of the life you really want to. How to resolve this? Healthy emotional processing looks different for everyone, but it generally involves these steps. Step one, get clear on what's happened. Step two, validate your feelings. And step three, determine a course of correction. First, you need to understand why you're upset or the reason why something is bothering you so much. Without clarity on this, you'll continue to waste your time mulling over the details without really understanding what's hurting you so much. Next, you have to validate how you feel. Recognize that you're not alone. Anyone in your situation would probably feel similar and does, and that what you feel is absolutely okay. In doing this, you can allow yourself to physically release by crying, shaking, journaling about how you feel, or talking to a friend. Once you are clear on what's wrong, you've allowed yourself to fully express the extent of your emotions. You can determine how you will change your behavior or thought process so that you can get an outcome that you really want in the future." Oh, how I love this book. It is really, really good so far. Again, it is titled The Mountain is You by Brianna Weist. Further research on an amygdala hijack, I came across an article written by Noelle McNamara, published September 2022, titled, What Was I Thinking? Handling the Amygdala Hijack. She explains what's happening and why, followed by useful tips to how to get your brain back online. Ironically, the article begins with an example of dealing with small children. It starts like this. Remember the time when you put the child you care for back to bed for the fourth time? Your thoughts suggested a level of desperation and wishful thinking, hoping that tonight will only be four times, please, because goodness knows how much longer you can go without a good night's sleep. And just as you hear the pitter-patter of feet down the hallway, sound familiar? What happens next is a blur. The hot head, those desperate thoughts, oh, no, come on, will you just go to sleep? This is ridiculous. I can't do this anymore. I must be the worst carer ever. I need a break. I literally thought the same thing a few days ago at work. *Editing failed after this point. I apologize