girl bye

Two friends start their first podcast and pray for success. They struggle with setting up the equipment and hope the audio improves. They pray for the podcast to be enjoyable and for their testimonies to inspire others. They talk about their Christian upbringing and how they met in high school. One friend shares her struggles with depression and therapy, while the other friend relates to her experiences. Okay, hi, this is our first podcast, and we need to pray that it goes well. No, no, no. Tell them what time it is first. It is currently 1241 in the morning on Thursday, August 1st, and we are doing this, yeah, it's kind of insane, isn't it? Yeah. Sorry, I moved my mic. I don't know about that. Yeah, that's probably going to change something. Yeah, we, like, actually have no idea how to work this equipment. We've been up, setting it up, like, all night. We've been doing this for a good, like, four hours. Yeah. But that's okay. You know? I don't know. I'm really hoping that your ears are protected. Yeah, I'm not being butchered right now. By the blood of Christ. Yeah. Okay, wait, let us pray, because we're going to get into a really deep topic. I think it's pretty dope. I honestly hope. Okay. Okay. Close your eyes. This is going to make me laugh. Okay. Okay. Lord, just take over. Just, honestly, just. I can't breathe. Cover this podcast right now. And we pray that the audio just somehow gets better, like, as we're doing this. And you know what? This is going to be good, okay? We're going to get better from here, Lord. Yeah. I hope we can look back at this and laugh. And if anybody watches this, if anybody watches this, we pray that you guys could also look back at it and laugh as well. Yeah, just enjoy this. And hope them enjoy this, Lord. I know you are. Yeah. So just, this is in your hands. And you know what? All the glory to you. So thank you for this, Fitbit. Thank you for allowing us to be here together. Thank you for the test that we had to go through to put everything. And patience, all that we needed. Yeah. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to be patient, even though we've kind of, like, desperately failed. But you know what? It's okay. Yeah. Okay. In Jesus' name we pray, amen. All right. So today we're going to be talking about our testimonies. And this is not funny. Like, they're pretty terrifying. But, you know, we definitely, we've gone through it. Like, there's no reason for doing this. We've definitely gone through it. It's definitely been a lot for both of us. But ultimately it was really rewarding going through everything that we had to go through because we both came to Christ in our lives permanently. It's definitely been a struggle. But, you know. I'm so awkward right now. It's okay. Things are working out. Things just always end up working out when God is in the picture. They really do. Even though, honestly, like, we have been through some hard, like, just dark times. But, like, it's fine. You know what? It creates these testimonies. And it makes them so good. So, yeah. And I think a lot of people, I mean, I would hope not relate, but I feel like a good amount will. We got it. It's not funny. We're just really nervous. Yeah. This is not even funny. This is just, like, scary. I really hope the audio's good, too. Yeah. Because we don't want to record it and then it's just really bad. And then we're going to be, like, yeah. Because Aubrey and I are just struggling with patience right now. Yeah. You know, we also, like, chugged our coffee, like, two hours ago. So we can't even talk. So we're probably going to edit a lot of this out. But if we don't, then you guys get to see the raw recording. So we just make it really chuffy on purpose? Yeah. No, exactly. That would be kind of funny. Okay. Okay, when do you want to start? I will start. You know what? Should I start fall? No, no, no. I'll just say January. No, no. I mean, we both grew up Christian. Okay. That's a good start. We kind of started from our childhood. We grew up that way. We both grew up in a Christian household. Yeah. My grandma was Catholic. My mom converted to Christianity. And we were both raised very. Yeah. We both experienced, like, a Catholic Christian. Yeah. So I'm actually really grateful for that because I feel like that definitely shaped my experience, even though at the same time, like, I kind of felt like it didn't at the time. But ultimately, having Christian parents helped a lot, you know. And it took me a while to actually start believing in God because I had so many doubts about him and everything that he could do and all the miracles and stories that you read up on the Bible and like that. I just had a really hard time believing that and thinking that it's not great to start believing that. But, yeah. Okay. Next part, maybe? Fine. Honestly, it doesn't matter. I think. Like, mine doesn't. Mine's very twisted. Mine's not pretty. So. Okay. So basically, me and her were both going through it in eighth grade. Like, and it was really weird how, like, we met and all of that. Can we start off with how we met? Oh, I think we should because honestly, like. It kind of, like, gives it a little bit of background. Like, if you want to know, like, about bringing two people together, it's really weird. It's just so odd how we connected. Like, how. Yeah, we reconnected. We literally were, like, led back to each other by, like, some inexplicable, like, reason. Literally just got. Yeah. Just got. But, so basically, we both hated soccer. We both played soccer together when we were younger. Yeah, we both hated it. We did not like soccer. My grandma made me cry. Yeah. Her grandpa was my coach for, like, two years. And he, like, made. I was, like, I played defense or whatever. And. No, we both played defense. We were, like, friends. Like. Yeah. Looking back at it, we were really close. We were really close, like, while we were playing soccer. And, yeah, her grandpa made me cry because he decided to switch me from defense to keeper, which was just not my thing. But it ended up being my thing. But anyways, we met when we were, like, what? Ten? Was it, like, ten or eleven? No. Or were we younger? I think we were younger. We could have been younger. I think the last time we saw each other was, like, ten. And then, like, we completely forgot that we existed. Yeah. We, like, never kept in touch, period. And then, going into high school, we both joined volleyball. And I go up to her because we're in, like, lines. We're in lines or something. We were in lines. What were we doing? It was, like, a passing drill. We were probably doing a passing drill or something. And I was, like, you look really freaking familiar. Oh, my gosh. I remember that. I remember I was looking at you, like, who is this girl? And she was, like, I have no idea who you are. And I was, like, no, I know you. Like, I know you. And then we, like, figured it out, like, later on. I kept telling you that you were crazy. You were, like, we played soccer together. And I was, like, no, we didn't. Then I came over to your house. And she saw all these pictures of me on the fridge. And she was, like, oh, my goodness. We are on the same page. Or we were on the same page. Yeah. And we've been friends since then. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So. Are you okay? Yeah, I mean, this is wonderful. Yeah. Okay. Start your speech. I'm trying to think of, like, where to start. It was, like, I guess I did believe in God when I was little. And, like, I did. But, like, he just, like, he seemed far away. Like, he seemed like something fake, you know? And, like, he, like, he seemed like he was there, but just, like, too far away to care. And so in seventh grade was when quarantine hit. And, you know, there was just a lot of things happening in my life with my family to where I was, like, I was, like, if God was really real, why would he do this? Like, why am I stuck here? Like, why would he really do this? And I just grew away. I was, like, you know what, if you're not going to answer me, then I'm going to go. I was, like, I'm going to figure this out on my own. Yeah. So then comes eighth grade. And let's just say, like, life really went down. Like, it went down. Like, me trying to find my own way was not it. You know, I just became insanely depressed. Like, to the point where, like, I wouldn't brush my hair. Like, my hair was in, like, a giant knot. Like a knot. She would show me TikToks, like, old TikToks of her, like, dress. And she would put a brush in her hair, and she would not take it out. Like, it would just stick to her head, you know, literally. Like, it was bad. Like, I would do that. I would crap myself. Like, I was just doing anything to feel anything. And, like, I mean, obviously it wasn't working. And, like, my family found out about it, and it became this whole big deal. And I was, like, I'm fine. Like, just leave me alone, you know. And then I end up in therapy. Because my decision, well, my mom, I should say my parents, gave me an ultimatum at the end of eighth grade because it got really bad. And the ultimatum was either I go to therapy with my mom or I do military school. Oh, yeah. Forgot about that. And I was, like, fine. I'll do therapy. Because, I mean, what choice do I really have? And then come to find out that me choosing therapy also meant that I had to go to elementary. And I didn't want that at all. I wanted to go to a totally different high school. And I was, like, there's no way. Like, I'm not doing that. I don't know anybody there. And come to find out, my mom signed me up for a volleyball program. Yeah. I had never played volleyball in my life. And she signed me up to play volleyball. I was, like, crystal. I was, like, your girl just came out of the depression, and you're throwing me into volleyball. I was, like, what? Okay. Yeah. And then we meet. Oh, yeah. And then we meet. And then we basically, like, actually, I think, okay. The first time I went to her house, this was, like, a week after we met. I was trauma dumping to her. And the way that we have, like, really similar experiences. Like, I was telling her about this one guy that I was dating in eighth grade. And, like, everything that went down. And she was, like, oh, yeah. Like, I love he did the same thing. No, literally. And, like, I was, like, what? And then she, like, just told me this story. And basically, like, we were just really close, like, from the beginning. Connected? Yeah. Like, we felt, like, oddly connected. Like, we could just kind of share freely, like, what was happening. Because we, like, it just felt natural for us to just share. And so we did. And come to find out, like, we had crazy similar experiences. Like, we literally had, okay. Did I tell them about? About what? About what? Our best friends. Yeah. Okay. So we had best friends. We both had, like, best friends in middle school. And they were our best friends all throughout middle school. And we still love them so much. And they were a big part of our lives. And, oh, my gosh. So we had a falling out with them. Mine didn't come until the end of freshman year. Yeah. Ours, they both came at different times. But they were, like, the same people. Like, the way we would. The exact same experience. It was the exact same experience. But, like, pretty much the exact same, like, falling out, kind of. Somewhat. Somewhat. Like, in a way. It was just way too similar. And then. Yeah. Yeah. Like, it's just been, like, a weird, like, understanding that we have. Yeah. Like, most people don't understand why we are the way we are. Yeah. And why we react to things the way we do. Yeah. But, like, meeting you, you were, like, no, that makes perfect sense. No, exactly. And I was, like, wait. And sometimes that could be, like, a problem because we think so alike. What? We become delusional? Yeah. We're just delusional. And we feed into each other's delusions, which is not okay. It's okay. It's fine. And we pray for grace from the Lord because we do not need to be delusional. We need to be telling each other the truth 100% of the time. And, I mean, it is the truth, but, like, anyway. It's just a little system. Ah! No, we can't be delusional. No. That's a joke. But. No, no, no. Don't listen to that. That was a joke. Yeah. You need to understand that, like, when we joke about things. I don't know. I don't think that helps us run away from it. He's listening. Okay, anyway. Yeah. Wait. Let me tell them how you brought me to this. So I feel like this is. Oh, wait. Should I. I don't know. We're going to have to cut a lot of this out, but it's fine. Should I tell them about how I came to. Oh, yeah. Okay. So. As for me, I, like I said, I was always. I was raised in a Christian household, and my mom was always very biting about, you know, church thoughts and who Jesus was. I learned who Jesus was at a very young age, but I didn't really learn who Jesus was. I didn't really accept who Jesus was until about the end of eighth grade year summer and start of freshman year. That's when I really started focusing on God. And the reason why is because I had to hit rock bottom. I hit rock bottom for what rock bottom is at eighth grade. So I had a pretty big group of friends in sixth grade, and then gradually throughout seventh and eighth grade, that friend group became, you know, kind of like tight, you know. And my eighth grade year was when I really hit rock bottom. I had been in a two-year relationship that was literally like, what, when I started? I was 12. I was 12 years old when I had my first serious relationship, which is crazy. But I have to be kind of vulnerable about this because that relationship really did shape a lot of my views on life. And, you know, when you're young like that, certain experiences are going to really, like, press a hole into your mind. So, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, I do. Okay, got it. But, you know, it's not funny. So when I was in eighth grade, I had a friend group of four girls, and these girls were my best friends, and we would hang out all the time. But unfortunately, within that group, I started getting into things that I shouldn't have also at a very young age. I really did things that I should not be doing, and I don't know if I can imagine what those are. Yeah, we did a lot, and especially in eighth grade is when it hit the fan, and I started actually branching out into things I never thought I would do. But I figured, why not do them? Because, I mean, there's really no consequences, you know? Like, I'm going to high school next year. I'm never going to see these people again. I'm not going to do this stuff anymore. When I get out of high school, why not just have some fun? Why not just live my life a little bit? And boy, was I freaking false. I was absolutely false, because it really did affect me, and I didn't understand how that worked at the time. And when I lost all of that, I lost the comfort that I was in. I lost my friends. I lost my boyfriend. I lost any sense of self-worth, any sense of self-respect. I lost myself just, like, completely. The only thing that I could do to redeem that was coming to God. And I was just so depressed. I sat in the same chair for two months, crying over my situation, just reliving it and reliving it until I was just done. And one day I decided, and I said, you know what? I'm done with it. I'm going to do whatever it takes to get back up again. And by the grace of God, He made this first kind of, like, so this is my kind of, like, breaking of innocence away. Like, this experience took me from one side of my childhood to me, like, actually having to mature, like, to, like, grow up. And it was really rough for me because I was so young. And, you know, when you're young and you lose all of your friends, that really takes a toll on you. And, yeah, one day I will get more into detail with that situation, but it's kind of brief for now. Yeah. And I came to God because of... Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I definitely came to God because of that situation. And He made my life so much easier. And not for long, but during that time, I just, He made me feel like I could just rest in Him. And, yes, I was depressed, but He was still there. He was still there to comfort me, and He gave me that peace. And I didn't even really know God. I never really had a relationship with God, but I could just sit in silence and cry and know that somebody was still there. I had a better sense of comfort than what I had before. And that's kind of really where it all started. And, you know, I had picked up my Bible. I bought a brand-new one. I was so excited because there were so many joys when coming to Christ. And as soon as I knew that things got better, when I turned to God, I started telling everyone, and my heart started changing. I did not want to do the things that I used to do. I just completely... There was a girl that I had pictured for myself when I was young, and I grew up knowing that I wanted to be this certain person. And I started seeing that when I came to Christ. But that's just kind of like, you know, that's just kind of like the start of it. That's just like a very brief, like, overview. But that kind of just leads into where Aubrey's at. So I'll let her take over. Okay. So, like Shay said, right when we became friends was when she was really into God. And I was really far away. I mean, I was into tarot. I was into just anything extremely away from God. I wanted nothing to do with Him. And of course I love Shay, and I would just be like, Shay, don't talk about that with me. I would be like, I love you, but not with me. And then I would say it was towards... I think it was actually, it was towards the end of freshman year when me and my one friend, we started to distance. And, like, I was losing that person. And, you know, I was like in this weird in-between. And then I was hanging out with Shay more often because we were on the same volleyball team for travel. And it was a requirement that if I slept over at Shay's house... Oh, yeah. ...that I had to go to her place. Every Sunday. Either on Saturday night or Sunday morning. There was no escaping. And I was like, do I really have to go? And her mom would be like, yes. And I would be like, dang it, we love Mary. And so, you know, for a good few months I would just sit there in church. And I would just zone out. And I'd be like, la-da-da-da-da. Right? And then I started reading this book. It was called The Power of Your Subconscious Mind. And Shay knows because I put her on this book that this book is life-changing. And throughout the book are verses, memories. And, you know, like that book, reading it forced me to read verses of the Bible. It forced me to because I was so into this book. And, you know, it led me to start reading it, which somehow, I don't even know how, it led me to actually start listening when I started to go to church with Shay. Yeah. And now I was actually paying attention. And I remember, like, it was just so weird for me because I hadn't been in church in so long. Years. I would only go to Easter with my mom. Yeah. And then, like, it just, it changed. And then I'm trying to think. So then I slowly, I started to go to church just slowly. It was like every other Sunday with my family. Well, at first it was only with Shay. Like, I did not want my family to know that I was going to church. And so I was only going with Shay and her mom. And then, like, and then my parents noticed me at church, or my mom, because my dad wasn't even going. Yeah. And my mom was like, oh my gosh, like, I'm so happy that you're here, like, da-da-da-da-da. And then I started to go with her. And it was just me and her. And then we would take my little sister to, like, daycare. And then slowly my dad started to go. And, I mean, for my dad to go, like, that was big. Yeah. He was, like, the biggest atheist I knew. Like, if you, like, at my time when I was, like, away from God, me and him would just side on, like, just being atheists. And then, and then that Christmas into, what was it, sophomore year, my mom bought me a Bible. Yeah. My first, like, actual Bible. And then Shay bought me a Bible that Christmas, too. Well, I insisted on buying her a CST study Bible. I was like, I don't care that your mom just bought you a new Bible. You're going to use both, okay? You're going to read both. Yeah. I remember that. It's so pretty, too. I literally, I hate touching it because it's so pretty. It's, like, tiny. Yeah. And it's also giant. Like, you can knock someone out with a Bible. Oh, that's, like, yeah. Abnormally. But back to my story. So, so this whole time, which I guess I should preface that I was never baptized as a kid. I guess I was raised Christian, but, like, my parents both made it their decision that, like, you know, I would decide what I wanted to believe in. And so I remember sophomore year just, like, listening, you know, going to church, and then I went through this, like, weird, like, almost like I had to follow the rules type of way of, like, it was, like, it was almost like, oh, I didn't do this. Yeah. So, so, like, now, like, I've sinned. So, like, oh, no. Yeah. And, like, I was just, I just avoided getting baptized because it was, like, I'm not, no, I wasn't, like, I didn't feel ready. I was, like, I'm not good enough. I was, like, you know, I can't do it right now when, like, I'm still doing all these things. Yeah. And then junior year comes, and now, at this point, I was in a relationship, and I knew it was wrong. Yeah. I knew what I was doing, and, like, just everything about it, I knew he wasn't the one. Yeah. And, like, I still, like, I was still there, and, like, I knew, again, that I wasn't enough because I wasn't doing good enough. Yeah. But, you know, I wanted to be with that guy. But, like, I was, like, you know, like, I can sacrifice it, like, and I would just, like, ration with myself. Like, you know, like, it's fine, it's fine. Like, I'll do it next week. I'll get baptized next week. Yeah. Like, I'll be better next week. And then, and then now, honestly, I've hit rock bottom a few times. Sorry. Give me a second. Sorry. It's been a lot. Because I was, like, why am I saying yes? You're, like, yeah. Like, yeah, you have. Yeah. Yeah, Aubrey. Yeah, no, you were pretty messed up, Aubrey. No. Just because I was, like, wait, why am I saying yeah after everything she's said? No. Oh, my goodness, Aubrey. Like, yeah, you were rationing with yourself. No. Yeah. No. You were. Yeah. Yeah. No, I'm not judging her because I'm looking to buy a two-year relationship in high school one day, and then you'll know. Oh, we can, that can be an entire podcast. That's an entire episode. Why you shouldn't date in high school. What? Yeah. What? That's really scary. Is it not? I'm joking. I'm joking. You're fine. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. I'm joking. 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No. She really couldn't. It was horrible. Yeah. Like, it was just breaking me. And it was to the point where, like, I was like, okay, God, like, I really need you right now before, like, I lose my, you know what. Yeah. Like, I was just at that point where I was like, you know, I have nothing else to lose. I've lost everything. I've lost my dignity. I've lost my car. I lost... Like, which, keep this in mind, was literally days before AP exams. Oh. Like, I was losing my mind. And honestly, if those exams weren't going to happen, I probably would have lost my mind. Like, if I didn't just, like, stick my head in the book and, like, focus on that, I would have lost my mind. But thankfully I didn't. And thankfully Shay was there to be like, hey, you're okay. You're breathing, you know. That's a blessing within itself. You know, a lot of people aren't breathing. So thankfully, yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. When she goes through, I go through. Exactly. We're always together, so. We really are always together. Yeah, we really are. She had to deal with me complaining for, like, years. But she still has to deal with me complaining over and over and over again. But that's okay. You know what? It's a new story to me every time I hear it. No, it really is. But there's actually new stories, so I think it's really refreshing for her. Yeah. And she should be really thankful that I still want this all the time. Well, people didn't need to talk to me. I had this little clip. Oh, yeah. You keep looking out the window, and it's scary. Like, you're scaring me. Can you stop doing that? Okay. I'm sorry. Okay. So, yeah. April, I hit rock bottom. Then AP exams come. You know, I feel somewhat confident after taking them. And then once they pass, I was like, oh, shoot. Now I have to actually jump back in reality. Like, I have to actually face my life. Which, thankfully, that Monday after, we went to a concert. Which, if you don't know the feeling of a concert, unless you're going to, like, some rap, then, you know, maybe you're not feeling. Yeah. But. Malcolm Todd. That's all I have to say. Malcolm Todd. He loves us. My favorite white boy. Yeah. So, absolutely. Yeah. It's just because his songs, like, especially for Aubrey at the time, they were so relatable. Insanely relatable. And reading them out loud was just the most relieving situation that could have happened right after her breakup. And especially since I was just like, wow. Like, I was just also filled with rage. Nothing towards this guy anymore, you know. Like, we forgive you, but you don't forgive us. Anyways. It was just the way I was filled with rage for her. I know. You were more angry than me. I was so angry. And it just healed. It just, it really did. It was very healing. It definitely, God gave me the money for that at the right time. You know what I mean? He really supplied. He knows what we need. He knows, you know, everything that we desire. He really delivered during that time. He always does. But he really, really, really delivered. Do you want to know what's really funny? So, my phone has been out of storage lately. I've been going through my camera roll, like, every single day trying to delete stuff. Today I went through all the videos from the concert, and you can hear me in every single video screaming. Like, something, something. No, like, I don't mean, like, I'm not screaming. Like, it's not even funny. Like, at the top of our lungs. No, yeah. Like, the crowd that we were with did not understand what level we were at. No, they, okay. They had no idea. They were not singing along. They were, to be fair, we just, we were only on balcony. Which I actually kind of preferred than being on the floor. Everybody else was not singing along. They had no idea what he was saying. And I was just, we were just sitting there. Or no, standing, jumping, running around. Literally. Screaming. Oh, yeah. Screaming the lyrics. Oh, yeah. So, Malcolm Codd, if you ever watch this episode, which I really hope you don't. Oh, thank you. Thank you. No, literally, thank you. Yep. But, so, we went to that concert, and now, again, I had hit rock bottom, so I'm, like, barely. Did you press the button? It was the sub. I really wanted to. You told me to say that I hit rock bottom, and you hit it. Okay. I hit rock bottom. What did you press? I don't know what this sound effect is, so I'm really hoping that. I hope it's something really funny. Yeah, it better be something funny. It better not be something weird. But, anyways, continue, Aubrey. So, I hit rock bottom, you know. I'm now trying to just, you know, find some balance. Because, like, if you've never hit rock bottom, for you to know, they just yawn. But, like, not any type of yawn. I love that. It's, like, majestic. Oh, my gosh. I don't know why. Well, if you've never hit rock bottom, like, honestly, like, you just need to know that it just shakes up your life to the point where, like, you wake up, and you're just, like, now what? Like, I would wake up every day just thinking, like, now what? Now what do I do? And I literally, I did not know. You need to stop saying that. There was no point. You could find zero points for living with that negative aura. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. I'm sorry. I hate myself for that. I hate yourself. I love you. I love you. I hate yourself. I love you, Jesus. I love you, Jesus. I love you, Jesus. You give me reasons. Okay, no, we're not. We're not songwriters. I love to say this. I hope we don't get copyright for that. Anyway, continue. Okay, yeah, okay. So, basically, I was finding my way back to this balance. And, you know, thankfully, summer was approaching. And let's just say that this summer, me and Shay very much lived. We summered. We summered. We summered. I feel like that's the best way to describe it. Like, we summered, especially in June. Like, we did something every day. Every single day. We were with each other every single day. Basically. The longest it would go without seeing each other was, like, a day. No, not even. It was, like, 12 hours. Yeah. And then we would be in a bar. And then we'd be back together. And we'd be like, I missed you. Yeah. Yeah. We got into a little bit of trouble. Yeah. But it wasn't, like, great, great trouble. No. No. But, yeah, I think, honestly, after hitting rock bottom, I needed that, like, just, like, life energy. Life energy. Yeah. Then, come July, was it July or was it the end of June? I honestly don't know when this happened. What happened? What are we talking about? We, just something very traumatic happened to Shay and I. Like, when I mean, like, traumatic, it was traumatic. Yeah, no. Like, yeah, it was bad. It was very bad. For the second time. But this time, this time was, was, we were, like, just, like, near death. Like, when people talk about, like, staying their life, their life, their life flashed before their eyes. We saw that. Not only did it flash, we were half, we were half dead. It literally happened in slow motion. Yeah. Yeah. Like, we were just sitting there watching it happen. No, literally. And we couldn't say anything. Yeah. Which, I mean, I don't know if we'll ever talk about that. I don't even know if we can. We will. Oh. We'll just start crying. I don't know if we can talk about it, though. Oh. Yeah. But. We'll see. We'll figure it out. It, honestly, it wasn't until that happened that, like, I realized, like, I just, I needed to give up. Yeah. And I was, like, no more of this place. Yeah, no more of, I'm not good enough, because at this point, I will never be enough. Yeah. To, like, I'm, I'm never going to be perfect. Like, I was, it was just an excuse for me to avoid it. Yeah. And going, like, honestly, I had to go through that, even though it was very extreme. It was a wake-up call. No, literally. Like, like, if that was not a wake-up call, I don't know what is. And, and then, what was it? It was, was it the weekend after, or was it two weekends after that we got baptized? We did it together. I'm actually in the shirt right now that we got baptized, though. Yeah. We both, we got, we made the decision to get baptized together on a random day, but I had to jump to do it. Up in the pool. Oh. Okay. I had already been baptized before, but when I was in the pool, I understood the point of that, and not just, you know, what it means to be baptized, and I just felt like I had both my mind and body, so I made the decision to get baptized again. Oh, my gosh. Sorry. The mic scared me. Where did it go? Say, why is he calling you at 1.30 in the morning? Where is it going? Is it down there? You see the bottom? No, no. Side. Side. Is it that? Where did it go? Library? Say, did we lose the whole hour? It was a good 40 minutes. Has it been recording this whole time? Has it been recording this entire time? What is it? Well, where do we leave off? Oh, I got scared by the mic. I laid back to, like, stretch, and I closed my eyes, and I opened them, and I just saw this big black thing in my face, and I was like, yeah. We are recording. It's literally 1 p.m. 1 p.m.? Yeah. Why isn't he doing something in India? Or Africa? India. Oh. Yeah. Anyway, that was it. Okay. Thank you, love, for tuning in. I hope you enjoyed all 52 minutes, and I'm going to assume, like, 45 seconds of this. We're definitely going to cut this. Oh, yeah. Because... Well... We love you. Oh, yeah. By the way, our podcast name is Simply Unscripted. Just letting y'all know. We probably forgot to mention that. Just so you know. You know. In case you want to. In case you want to watch this again, or listen to us again. We hope you do. We promise we'll be better at this. Yeah, that we won't be sleep deprived next time. No, yeah. Exactly. But we have to start somewhere. Exactly. All right. Well, thank you, Lord, for this opportunity. Thank you for bringing us together again. And we pray that the next podcast is always going to be better because, you know... Yeah. What she said. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, wait. No. How long has it been like that? I don't know. Oh, no. It was really loud, and I hope nobody can hear it. I really hope you can see how close this is to my face. Like me sitting up like this. Okay. Bye. Wait, why is it only 54 minutes? Girl, can you end? Okay. What? What? What?