LOL Black Magic

Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Some guy just called and yelled at me. Hello? Hello? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Some guy just called and yelled at me. Hello? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Some guy just called and yelled at me. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? I'm alright. I'm a little upset because some guy just called and yelled at me. Pardon? Yes, a pleasant day to you. How was your day today? Thank you. God bless you too, sir. Thank you. God bless you too, sir. Thank you. God bless you too, sir. Such a beautiful day today. God has blessed us both. So, how can I help you? You left a message on my machine about some winning or something like that. I feel like God is upon me today. Yes, you're a winner of 18.5 million dollars and a brand new 2020. Oh, Lord. A brand new 2023 S550. Whoa. That is a bonus prize. That is a godly car. I'm going to be a boss in that thing. And how do you truly feel to know you're a winner today? I feel like I'm the boss now. I feel like I'm going to be the boss. Like rolling around in that with nice clothes and all that other stuff. Sunglasses. Josh, Josh, Josh. You're taking this for a joke and that's not something nice you're doing. You know that, Josh? I'm not taking it for a joke. I'm being positive. I'm saying like, yo, I'm going to be a boss rolling around looking good. You know? Why are you taking this for a joke? Are you wasting my time? Are you wasting my time? Because you're making false hopes here. I feel like I won but I didn't. Now. Yes, go ahead. Do I win or do I lose? You're already a winner. For you to claim your prize you would have to get two registration cards. I've already got four registration cards for somebody else but you can have them. How much cards did you get in total? I have six. And when did you get them? I got them yesterday. There's American Express and there's Vanilla Visa, I believe. How much did you get each card for? Each card has $250 on it. And how much in total did you pay for each card? $250 for each card plus the activation fee for each one. Okay. Get the Vanilla gift cards in your hand. Okay. Do you need two or just one? How much of the gift cards do you have there? I've got six. We need all six of them. All six? We can't split them with the other person because the other person said I'm a winner too. His name is Dave Sayer. Well, Mr. Sayer, he knows that your prize is supposed to be delivered and it is. Yeah, but he's delivering our prize as well. All you're going to do is get the cards. And then Andy Goldberg, he's rolling up too. Andy Goldberg's rolling up too, brother. Like we're going to have a block party. Listen, where's the cards? The cards are right here. Do you think I'm just going to give them to you just like that? Like I've got other guys that they're promised to. And here you're demanding them right away. You're not even telling me what I'm getting for a prize. Like these other guys have told me what I'm getting. These other guys have, like, spent time with me. They've talked to me. And you're just trying to, like, steal my money right away. And why would you say that? Because you're, like, asking for all these gift cards and they should be shared among the company with the other fellows because I'm winners with them too. Listen, all you're doing here. You're obviously not listening. All startup bullshit. You're obviously not listening. All startup bullshit. No, you're obviously not listening, man. Why don't you pull the Rastakhan out your ass? Listen, pussy ball. I know you don't want a prize or you're some sort of... Oh, I know I ain't getting no fucking prize. Fuck you and get off my phone. This is your prize. Fuck you. Oh, you want to fuck me? No way, man. Fuck you, not me. No way. Not me. I'm not given into temptation. You're a piece of shit. Get off my phone. I'm a piece of shit. David Fisher speaking. What are you doing, assclat? Fucking your mama. No, you're not. You're scamming people today. You can't fucking afford to fuck my mama. You don't have 90 cents. Fucking dirty, filthy, little gift card pumping little bitch. Peddling little motherfucker. So, you got anything to say to me? You going to call me some names? You going to say fuck you? You know, those audios I'm going to pull up after are going to be just great. So I'm going to record you and put you on a soundboard. Change your sound a bit. You're going to say, I am gay. I can do that. What are you saying? You're going to say I am gay. Your voice is going to say that. All I have to do is put you through an AI and I can mimic your voice. I can go around with your voice, repeating it to everybody. You saying you're gay. David Fisher is gay. He fishes in all the big ones like Ed Goldberg and Mr. David Thayer. You know, Tina Turner. You know, Martha Stewart maybe. Listen, listen, listen, listen, listen, listen. Listen, go make your YouTube videos. Go make your YouTube videos, you motherfucker. You think you can get me? I don't care if you're a hacker or you're what. Fuck you. That's why you can't find me anywhere. That's why you don't know who the fuck I am. And that's why you're so scared right now in your black little boot. Scared of what? You're scared. You're scared, you petty little fucking scammer. What am I scared about? You're scared that I'm going to get you, Mr. Howard Foster. Fuck you and fuck the police where you live. Give them my number, you piece of shit. Fuck the police. They're coming straight out of Compton. We take money on computers. You're a piece of shit. You can go suck the police's cock, okay? If you're a rat, then that's your problem. That's not mine. So why do you keep on calling me? Why? Because, man, you keep stealing. You keep stealing from people. You know it's wrong, so I'm going to call. You know when you call me, when you call me, I take a dick. I'm going to call you all day, okay? I'm going to put you on an all-week call list if you keep complaining like a little baby, okay? Keep complaining. Do you want a rattle or a yo-yo or something? So it whacks you in the head and you shut the fuck up? I wish I could text your mama to abuse her. You know that? My mom would touch you all over and all over again. She'll steal you all over. You're a fucking faggot. Get off my phone. Oh, you are a fucking bumbleclot. You don't have any respect. Pussy rascalot, man. Rasta man, I bet you haven't even trimmed, man. You bet I didn't even trim. You didn't trim, man. No, you still got the rasta-clad, bumbleclad pussy world on your head, man. I'm not the one that doesn't, that, that, that, that makes it hard for you to steal. I'm not the one that makes it hard for you to steal. Play fucking asshole. Don't play these tricks, you motherfucker. I'm not going to get off your phone. Who was that? What was that? You Indian piece of shit. I'm not an Indian. Oh my God. I'm not Indian, you motherfucker. Why would you say I'm a fucking Indian? Bhagwan, you called this number. You are a sucker. You are not a winner. This clearing house, Jamaica, they want an accuser. Because they are frauds, scammers, Jamaican scammers, bumbleclots, pussy wolves. How did you win? How did you win? Scammers, do not call this number. You are not the winner. You are wasting time with me. Oh man, he even said it right. He even said it right. Publishers Clearing House, how may I help you today? Well, we're calling to try to scam you guys. But you guys won't pick up and do the right thing. I'm just returning a phone call. Quit calling this fucking number. I'm not calling. I was calling about a prize. You got me all excited. What prize? You haven't won any fucking prizes today. I think that's actually you. That's you in the recording. That's your mama cheating on your dad, you piece of shit. We were trying to fucking scam you. Oh no, it was another stupid ass. It was another stupid ass. It wasn't you. You're not worth being recorded. That definitely wasn't you. Mr. Howard Foster. Did you hang up? I want to hang my dick down your mama's throat. I don't need to hear that. That's disgusting. I want to hang my dick in your mama's throat. That's what I want to do. Can you stop talking about dicks and stuff like that? You're awfully gay. I want to hang my dick down your mama's throat. You guys like, you rope in horses with a dick down there? Because that's why your big black dick is so big. I want to hang my dick in your mama's throat. You want to do it around a fucking horse? Fuck off. Do you have the horse chomped down on your cock? I don't know. It's just a theory. Your mama, your wife may be cheating right now when you're calling me. I don't give a shit if she's cheating. That's why I left her ass. I'd rather be talking to you than looking at her ugly face. I'm going to hang up right now. What are you calling for more? You thirsty? Are you thirsty for more, motherfucker? You came for some more, huh? What are you on, man? Are you on Rastakhan firing, man? I'm on cannabis, son. I smoke, I smoke, I smoke cannabis. Well, that was a Mad Jamaican. When this tells hit you, you won't believe. Your car's going to run under a truck. I'm going to run your car. I'm going to run your car under a fucking truck and kill you. You ever heard about black magic? You ever heard about voodoo? You keep calling me, I'm going to send your car under a fucking truck and kill you. Keep calling my phone. You keep calling me and calling me. You ever heard about voodoo, motherfucker? Yeah, bring it on, daddy. You're going to see. When you're holding that brakes and it can't hold and you're going under that fucking truck, I'm going to put a stop in to you. You're stopping our food out here. You're not doing anything beneficial to us. You need to die. I'm going to put a stop in to you. You ever heard about black magic? You ever heard about voodoo? I know, I've never heard of black magic. You don't worry, I'm going to show you something, you piece of shit. What are you going to show me? Move out my way.