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dating 101

Emily Naylor

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Yeah, I think so. Okay. What? I know, I might wee. I've got shit in my eyes. Oh god. It's you're fine. Oh my god. You're cool. I'm just gonna be staring at you the whole time. Hi guys. Oh. Hi, good to see you there. This is gonna be, it's gonna be hell in there. Hi guys. Welcome back to Nailed It. Sorry, sorry I'm sweating. Alpaca. Oh right. What is mohair? I don't. I don't actually. Do I want to know? I know I don't know, I mean I don't know the difference because I'm like. I'll crop it out. Yeah, we'll crop that. The beauty of this editing darling. Yeah, crop out the whole thing. I'm sweating. I was gonna leave it in. Boiling. Hello Bambinos. All right dad? Hot is it? Boiling. He is your dad. Martin our friend and I didn't really know Martin. He actually is my dad. Hi guys. Welcome back. Hey. We're both riddled with hair in our mouth and eyes. Yeah, there's just too much of it. There is a lot going on right now. Honestly, I don't understand why Brittany did what she did. Guys, welcome back to the podcast. Welcome to the 101 series. To my left, we have. We have a woman who needs no introduction. Sherry. Sherry. Right, sorry. We're only four minutes in. Are we four minutes? Probs. Right, we're not starting. No, we're three minutes and two seconds. Sorry. I told you there would be a lot of ADHD in this episode guys. I wasn't really lying. Well, welcome back. As I said, the woman to my left needs absolutely no introduction. She is the love of my life. My soulmate. Everything in between. The goddamn girl. Hold the tears. Hold the applause. Miss Annabelle Howard, ladies and gentlemen. I'm actually bullshit. I've done really well. I am seriously sweating. Hey. Hey. Oh my God. Hey girl. Hey. Rise and shine. Love it. I think I actually started this podcast just so we could have an episode together. I'm not. I love that. Anything else after this can be dissolved. Dissolved. Like sugar. Yassi. So yeah, thought I'd bring on Annabelle to talk all things dating. And we had so many lovely questions and exciting things to discuss and get into. I'm excited. It's all a wee bit much, isn't it, darling? It is. Overwhelmed. Disclaimer. There's going to be a lot of different accents. A lot of memes and vines will be quoted. Just stay with us right through the journey. If you want to be part of it, stay tuned. I'd rather like the reviews too. Correct them on though. But you know what? You know what you sign up for when you listen to this one, guys. So, yeah. Should we do a weekend recap? Yeah, we can do. Mine's pretty boring. Oh. What did I do this weekend? I feel like yours is way more interesting than mine. I just worked. I'm second at chilled these days, you know what I mean? Post-Mentee Day. Oh. We need one, though. Here for the breakdown, here for the chill. At least once or twice a month, at least. Correct them on, though. This weekend, it was... Oh, I saw the fam. Do a lot of fam things. I had a bath. Not just one bath over the weekend. I show it on the other days. But I treat myself to a bath. I do like a bath every now and then. Shave the legs. Wash the weave. Stunning. It does freak me out at the same time. I have to have a shower after I've had a bath. The water bill is through the goddamn roof. It's fine. I always overfill it. Mom goes mad. She's like, Annabelle! I'm like, Annabelle! Sorry, drama. Should we listen to this, Gwyn? Yeah. All right! Whoa. Yeah, to be fair, you probably are. Charlotte, me and Silver having this conversation, Charlotte always takes the crown because she's the firstborn. I think it's you. No offense, girlie. I would agree. She stayed through the hard times. Thank you. Respect. I saw them and went to be like, hmm. Yeah, you saw your family. You had a bath. You cleansed your body. Do you carry a lunchbox? Yeah, no. It was my niece's second birthday. I saw my other nephew. Rory. Rory and Katie. He's three weeks old. He still smells as baby. It's a cute smell, isn't it? He's gorgeous. My niece turned two, so it was all for the family. I watched Top Gun Maverick as well. Oh, did you like it? Oh my god, I loved it. What the fuck is Tom Cruise eating besides a flesh of small children? He sicks it. Don't know if I can say that, said it anyway. Church of Scientology is doing wonders for his fucking skin care. Yeah, that Scientology's mental, isn't it? But he's like, I don't know. There's something not right about him. He creeps me out a lot. Yeah. Because I just know he's just a weirdo in real life. A hundred percent. He does some mental, what is it called? He does all his own stunts and stuff, doesn't he? Yeah. I was going to say, didn't he jump out of a plane in the middle of a mountain? Yeah, something ridiculous. I'm sure he would jump. You know when you see people running roof to roof? Yeah, that was it. And he snapped his ankle like it were nothing. Could have been me. Not with these knees. Why do we have knee problems at 25? It's ridiculous, isn't it? It's from going to level. Bottom floor, man. Just getting low. He's mental, though. But that is a star-studded cast, that. Glenn Powell's in it, and he's a noddle in it. Yeah, he is. He's good at playing the dickhead character. He really is. I thought it was really good, but I did think it was a bit cringe. But they've overdone it because people have waited years for another film to come out. It had everything. It had drama, action, romance. He got the woman. He flew the plane. Bruised his ego. Solved his historical family issues. He's done it all. Can he lie? And I nailed the Chinese. Oh, nice. I don't have a Chinese often. And when I do, it's just great. It was decent. You're just so dry afterwards, though, aren't you? It wasn't as good as the Chinese we had the week before. That was unreal. That was really good. When you're ready to dish out the discount code, I will be start working. Please. See my boss. You there. Next to the hygiene rating. Five stars. Nailed it. Literally. Discount. How was your weekend, darling? It was alright. I did night shifts. I just spent the whole weekend just zombieing out and being really pale. Just like, not today. Not with those arms. No, I won't do on this light. I probably said won't do. But no, I was very tanned before. Put it against the couch. Don't put it next to my head. Alright then. Just chilled. Caught up on sleep. Saw Jack. On Sunday, I did a big self-care day. That's all I ever do. What did you actually do on Sunday? Oh, I watched Tales of Heroes 4. Unbelievable. It was so good. I actually didn't realise how long it was. I was like, it's still going. I was like, I'm loving this, but it's still going. My Tango Eye class were gone in cinema before the end of the lover set. I was only about five songs in it. When you need a wee. I watched June Part 2 a couple of weeks ago. I held in a wee for so long. I was trying my best because it's such a good film. What is it about? Is it on the vibe of Star Trek? I wouldn't say so, no. It's better than Star Trek. Excellent news. Star Trek sucks. I can't even explain. I'm not going to try and explain. I googled the plot and by the third sentence my head was mangled with all the long names. I can't even explain. It's kind of like sci-fi but it isn't at the same... I don't know. It's not all about space and stuff. They're in the desert, aren't they? In the desert. In a good home. It's so good. Because so much goes on in the film I felt like I couldn't go to the toilet. I didn't anticipate it. I said to Jack, you'll have to fill me in. I vaulted it downstairs. There's nothing like the sprint from your seat to the new toilet. When you run down the hallway to get out, I always panic that there's someone behind me. I feel like there should be cameras and what people look like when you run to the toilet. Did you watch the film at Middlebrook? Phenomenal. You take your lights off when you're the last person in the room and you run upstairs. That's literally what I do. I think it's more humbling when you get out into the... the main bit where there's LED lights on. The common room. And there's people queuing for the popcorn and you're like... You don't know where it is. You know exactly where it is. It's not moved for 25 years. Do you remember when they used to check your ticket and go in? I left past you. Three hours ago, I'm still here, watching the same film. The same goddamn film. Speaking of holding away, oh my Christ, on Friday I went to an appointment for work that could have been a team's appointment. If you can make it a team's appointment, people just need to do it. It's not worth the mileage and it wasn't worth what happened. I razzed it there. As I was driving to it, I've been to this place once before and I came a different way. As I was driving though, I was like, you know, pedal to the metal, albeit I have a black box in my car, which is depressing. It's an unfortunate turn of events given I've been driving for six years. But you know what? Shit happens. I'm the exact same. Excellent. I'm outing myself now. They don't track this. No. Aww. Do you want to get in line? What are you going to do about that? Shoot me. I have to catch myself like a whistle. I'm actually not. I'm such a grandma in the car. I'm either too extreme and either like in a... Yeah. Oh my God. Razzing it in second gear on the motorway. Or I'm literally just like nosying on that. Can't be bothered. Overtake? No. Cruising and perusing? Why don't you just overtake? Be quiet. I'm like, I'm the kind of driver that I hate. Why aren't they moving? Leave. I'm a prefect. Move. I wonder what he's up to now. Where is he? I know. I wonder what's going on with him. Anywhere. What is his actual name? I was having a prefect. We'll circle back to that one. What's his actual name? Day of birth, blood type? Sounds like... So, I drove to this bastard appointment, right, and I'm literally a minute away from the turning in. Smashed a pothole. I was like, oh, that didn't sound good. You know sometimes you sink into a pothole and you're like, oh, are you up? No. It was like, I was like, that wasn't cute. And then, I parked up, did the appointment, left, got back on the road. I had a call at 4pm. I had a call at 4pm on a Friday. I had an eyebrow appointment. I had things to make, things to be home for. It was a two and a half hour trip back. Do you know how many questions he asked me in that meeting? Three. So, did it just drag and go on for hours? I literally, it got to about 40 minutes in when they hadn't asked me anything. I went, guys, with all due respect, I've got two and a half hours on. When someone says, with all due respect, you know you're about to get a fucking kick in the tits. Yeah, because it's like, come on now, what are we doing? What do you want me here for? They're like, oh yeah, boom, boom, boom. Do I need to be here for this meeting? Do I actually need to attend this? You know what jarred me more? Four people joined on Teams after I asked if I could join on Teams and was told no. For God's sake. Someone, Dad thought it out, someone was not on my side on Friday. You were like, I need my eyebrows done. The brows, but look at them now. It's such an important appointment though. And the top lip. Thank you. To get mine done, you know. I've never seen your top lip hair, ever. Have you not? No. Magnified mirror. I see all the hairs growing out of my chin with a magnified mirror. I've literally got a beard. Save that. I'm like, what on earth is going on? I cycle every day. I don't want to pay for laser. I don't want to go there. I don't want it. Can you believe a year ago, we went to Chris Brown. That was such a good night. So emotional. And this year we're going to Taylor Swift, another five hour concert. But, for last year, we had Chris Brown and we had Harry Styles. That was unbelievable. The year before, we had Sean Paul and Dua Lipa. Wait, let me finish this story and then we'll get on to Sean Paul. Right, so basically, long story short, half an hour into my journey home, my tyres started pissing air out of it, and I got stuck on a 60 mile an hour road which is the arse end of Derby to the middle of nothing. This is where my geography lacks. It lacks for me. I rang the RAC, where are you? I went, I don't have a fucking clue. Do you know what road you're on? No. Do you know what's around you? Literally nothing. I'm on a four way crossroad at 60 mile an hour. Lorries are running past me. Like, they're fucking going to miss the T. I was like, and I'm about to get killed. I couldn't fucking use it. The sheer panic. It was horrendous. I'd hate that. 200 quid later, and 90 minutes old and a piss. Staring at cows. Because I got dragged onto a cow farm. That's where I parked. So you did a nature wee? No. I wanted to, but it was a bit too exposed. There was nothing around me that I could have hid in or behind that wouldn't have been literally urinating on someone's property. Nothing. Nothing at all. Nada. And then the guy came and fixed my tyre and then it was a two hour drive home. So I got home at quarter past six on a Friday. Missed my eyebrows, missed my other calls. Did the team call from the car? She missed it? Oh my god. She hit me on Saturday morning, the leg end. Me there like, oh you missed your eyebrows? Even though you were literally on the side of the motorway. So dangerous. What are the priorities here? Right, Sean the Pole. Well, we recounted this story recently to be fair. We were watching Sean Paul's two years ago. Oh god, it will be two years ago, yeah. What a time to be alive. It was the same weekend I was at that festival with Finn and Ellie. Oh my god, yeah. The most spontaneous romantic thing she's ever done for me. She texted me one day in work and she was like, Emily, send me a print screen, I've bought us these tickets. Do you know what it was? I was at my hairdresser's. Me and my hairdresser were talking about concerts and stuff. I was like, me and my friend Emily love going to concerts. And she was like, I'm going to Sean Paul. I went, what? I was like, oh my god. So I looked and I was like, I found us two tickets. I went, I'm just going to buy it and then she can't come. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I'll cross that bridge when it comes, but I just booked it and then I was like, we're going to Sean Paul. You went, what? You're like, I don't know, I've got plans. You can't be doing this. I was like, obviously I'm there. Obviously I'm coming, but I'm helping. At least consult me first. But luckily the tickets were dirt cheap. Like 50 quid. I tell you what, for that venue, they should have paid us to go. Fuck me. I actually can't deal with the bar. Describe the bar. It was just like a pop-up. It was like a load of trolleys had been turned on the back and a tablecloth were put over it. We were fighting to get to it. I felt like I was at a house party in year 11. When you make your table and your dining room into a bar. That's what it was literally like. It was like, do you remember in lockdown? Not lockdown, but when lockdown started to lift and everyone was allowed to mix again and I had people roaming at mine and I turned my dressing table into a bar in my dressing room. That was literally what it was like. In the tiniest little plastic cup you'd pay a tenner for one drink. And we were like, a tenner? We were basically in a big warehouse. It was a big box and it was boiling. It was in the beginning of September, so the back end of summer. It was about 30 degrees. In the photo dump this week I will post the video of us where there is literally oil slicking down our face. We're melting. You've got body oil. It's literally pure sweat. I'm melting. Honestly, my hair was disgusting. It was fully stuck to my forehead. You can see all my strands of hair. We looked so fit as well. I'm not even going to lie to you. We looked so nice. We went out and did it before it was dead nice. And then we got to the venue dead early because we thought it was going to be rammed. And it didn't get rammed for like three hours later. Before we knew it, it was literally like beyond you. It was awful. It was horrendous. We went to a port-a-loo outside because obviously it's port-a-loos. God forbid they have normal working fucking anything. They only had like 10 port-a-loos. It was a room that held 5,000 people with 20,000 people in it. Right. 10 port-a-loos. We went in this port-a-loo and there were people yakking outside. When I'm with people, me, I get a bit brave. I get a bit shirty. I think they were singing Sean Paul and we sang it with them as a joke because we were both a bit tipsy and had a good time. And they were like, like youths. Fucking hurry up. Yeah, youths, that's what we'll call them. Youths just like kicking. And they tipped. Tipped the port-a-loo. I was like, I'll be fucking damned if some little rat-ass out there covers me in my own piss and shit. Fuck off. And the crowd was just crazy. It was like anyone from the age of 14 to like in the 60s. We saw some dutty whining from some middle-aged folks. Yeah. Honestly, it was such a good night because it was just funny. In a crowd, that's just so random. So character building. Me and my hairdresser still talk about it because it was such an eventful night and crowd. But Sean Paul was so good. He was great. Honestly, he sounds exactly the same. He really does. He was either miming or... My favourite was I'd do anything I could for you What a tune! Honestly, that was so good. I really enjoyed it. And we just... What did we do? We just went home. We got about eight songs in and we were like, we can't do this anymore. We were literally up people's asses. We peaked really early to be fair. And then the crowd was just crazy. Did we not have to go in VIP? We were like, how much is VIP? I was like, I'm willing to pay anything. Because it was so hot and sweaty and grim. The VIP was like a plastic suspended balcony. It was like a glass balcony but you could see all the condensation from how... Tell you what, it's not where you are, it's who you're with. Absolutely. We had such a good time. We could have had the worst time. There was so much going on. With someone else, that would have been a horrible night. I could literally be fucking in the coal mines. Up a chimney. I was having the worst job in the world. Chimney sweep. Why is it that used to petrify me? Because we used to learn about the Victorians. You'd either be climbing under a mill or up a chimney stepping out. And I'm like, God, poor kids. Like it happened to our brothers and sisters. Like Roman Empire for men. Did you ever go to Quarry Bank Mill? Was that just my primary school who wanted to fucking subject us to early child abuse? Oh yeah, no, I went there. And it was cold. And it always rained. And there was like someone spinning a yarn. You know, a yarn. Did they make you dress up? Like in the outfit? In horrible clothes that smelled of piss. Like we've worn by the previous class before. Yeah, there's riddles. It was damp. Like they couldn't have even lost and found No, I remember once I got an absolute steal in our PE lesson. Because I got an Italy 2012 top when I didn't go to Italy. And I really wanted it. You were fuming, you didn't go. I didn't think that many people would go. And then everyone went and I was like, I'm so depressed, I wish I went. At the time, I was a little fat and I created exercise. And now I'm like, oh, look at me. No, you weren't. I'm the kind of person that shouldn't have gone because I fucking hated it. You were literally doing sport for like eight or nine hours a day. Really? In the boiling hot sun. And then in the evening you'd just like, chill. Go like, on the strip. On the strip? On the strip with Mr. Cartwright? Mr. Starrick? I'd just fucking punch the tea. That's a taste of later. Me fuming. You'd get on the wrong side of that kid. Bang! There's a bolting kick in process. Literally, it was just constant sport all day and boiling it. And I just used to burn. So it was just like the worst burn. And it was like, in front of all the boys, you'd be like, oh. You know what I mean? You just know you were thriving off that. Yeah. Yeah, not me at all. Me and Sinead. Remember Sinead? We were just glued to each other. It was so much fun, but it was like, I kind of hated it at the same time. PE was like, in PE, everyone had a scarf on. And I proceeded to wear lads footy shorts. I was like, not in like a fucking I'm a tomboy. I get on better with boys. Oh, no. No, because they exited. That was some elder friend. My whole PE kit was from Lost and Found. My parents didn't like it. Oh, there was somebody nicking your stuff. Probs. Who was it? They never nicked my Hollister spray. That's literally what it smelled like. Our PE changing room went off on stench, but good stench. Good stench. Oh, my God. We had a big sports, so our school, our high school, so one of the questions actually that we were asked was how we met. Oh. I know. We will actually talk about where we met, but I was going to say, our school was like a sports college, wasn't it? Is it still? It was like St. George's sports college, wasn't it? With the dome. Honest to God, that dome. D-O. Yo. It's the worst thing on the North Sea side. It's ridiculous. Fuck me. We had the dome, and it had a revolving door, and I'll never forget one day when that fucking helicopter landed on the yard. I was like the only one at school that day. Someone got stuck in the dome, the fucking silly twat. Sorry if you're listening much. Concentrate. We were going to the dome. No, but you did well shouting out like, look at where you're going, look at what you're doing. Think about it. I remember once when we thought, I was going, why are they so dramatic? Don't swing on that chair! Fucking like the Kimbo in the middle of R.A. End scene. No, um, but I remember the helicopter landing on the yard. I also remember running into the dome once, thinking that I'd spot about four of us. I'm sure you were one of them. It was like me, Megan McGrath and someone else. Miss Walsh was like, right girls, get moving! I don't know. Some of us, like, run basically. She fucking loved R.A. R.A. was split into two halves, the P.E. Oh no, I was on the naughty side. No you weren't! Me and my girl group on that side, we all got banned from P.E. For actually no reason, we actually behaved that lesson. And we got boned. Banned? I thought you were in my P.E. No, but we were in the same P.E. up until Year 9 and they split it into two different groups, don't they? I remember dancing P.E. I know, but I remember it can't have been you then. Megan was definitely in my P.E. I ran into the dome with sheer confidence that we were in the dome and all the lads were in there playing footy. And in Year 11, when I, like, you know, started dropping timber, I was like, oh, I'm getting something about me and I was like, errr, why have I just done that? I'd never cringed so much at myself in my entire life. There was nothing worse than going to the dome, or no, if it was, like, an older year group. Oh my god. Why did we give a fuck about the year above us? I swear it was an older year group. It was, like, Year 11 or something. It might have been Year 11 and 10, I can't remember. I used to fear if you had to go into another lesson and, like, knock on the door and be like, errr, I can do this. Mr. Singleton said, You know what, Year 11's like, You alright there, mate? Don't look at me. Every day. Literally with the fringe. My full fringe. Literally the full fringe. Oh my god, you actually had a full fringe? I had a full fringe. No, never again. Not even bangers. Did he say, no, you'd probably be able to rock it now? I definitely wouldn't. I feel like he would, though. I don't know anyone who pulled off a full fringe. But now you have a thin-haired curly. I don't know if he'd want it, like, little... No. Like tentacles on the fod. Fodicles. Well, anyway, guys, this has been a solid half an hour of bonkers. Shall we get into the topic? Yes, we can. We've had so many questions. I already know this is going to be a two-parter, so let's get into it. Let's get comfortable. You know, my intrusive thought then was, like, this was a drink, and I was like, try and drink. Come on, England! If you don't know, get to know. What have they done? OK, so... I can't believe you've done this. You want to take that prize money and go buy yourself some lessons in... What, the erasing decorum? The erasing decorum of a reversing dump truck with no blind spot. You've won, Jane. Iconic. What a mouth. Where is he now? He must know he's, like, an online sensation. It was, like, thinking no-one spoke like that ever, and then it just went viral. That's one of the good things about the internet. With the whisk. And then the woman with the oven gloves, using the oven gloves for everything. Did she dip her finger in some of it as well? Yeah, she was grim. Get on this. Zero hand-washing. Her kitchen definitely smelled bad. There was grime where grime shouldn't be. She was cooking on top of grime. She was so funny, though. I love her buzz. I just love buzz. The guy who does the voice over the top. He's brilliant. He's like the naughty version of fucking Ian Stirling, isn't he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, me and Annabelle, I would say, out of all our friends, had, like... Annabelle is someone I go to advice for on pretty much everything. She's like, this idiot for real? So, I thought my earring had fell out then. I thought I was having a pee in a pyre at one point. I'm like, hoping that your back is still in there. Trying to salvage it from falling. Pulling up at the lights. Staring at the blank page before you. Anyway, I'm sorry. Carry on. I thought me and Annabelle have had quite a well-rounded, we're both in very happy, secure, loving, gorgeous relationship now with our men. Looking out to the thought. I know. I wouldn't do that then. But yeah, so, we're in really nice relationship now, but we've had a fair share of, I don't know if fun is the word, of experiences over the years. And I think for the type of questions we've got, we're well-rounded characters, aren't we, darlings? We've seen the world. We've done the lot. At the young age of 25. Oh, that's in life. Oh, look at me. Call me Mahatma. Mahatma Naylor. Dandy's a well-rounded bloke, isn't he? Yeah. Is he dead? Yeah. I've never seen you look at me with such... I was like... Yeah. No, yeah, he's definitely dead. Yeah, no, you are right. Anyway, so, we've got a hell of a lot of different questions to get through. So yeah, I thought me and Annabelle would be a good set to go through. You know the annoying thing about me and Annabelle as well, we've been friends since... Well, the first question I actually got was who did we meet? So we might as well box that one off first, because it's not dating related. So, I'll take it right back. Sierra's 22. You're so good at remembering years. It's only because we left in 2015 and it's a wrong number. And we had five years. That's an easy way of thinking about it, but I'm just like... Zeros and fives, I remember. Yeah. You know what, I convinced myself my birthday was the 5th of November for about six years. Why, because you like the number? Yeah, and because it was bonfire night. Remember, remember. How are you going to make this about me? Literally. Fireworks going off outside. I was like, I want some of that. How do I make this about me? Everyone in school was like, no way. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Ew, you're bullying me. So, yeah. It's a warm, mild September morning. We're strolling in our blazers and our clip-on ties. Why the fuck do you have to wear a tie in year 7 but not in year 11? I don't know. I think they do now. They made it a bit more strict. The uniforms all changed. I haven't got a clue. It all got a bit lax, you see. The officer reports went down the shitter. I know, everyone couldn't wait to get to year 9. Ditch the blazer. I love the migration of our uniforms as we got through school as well. Year 7, goody two shoes, you wore the full lot. Year 8, hitching up the skirt. Year 9, just your jumper. You were like, oh. Year 10, what did we do in year 10? Year 10 was just the normal, like, jumper and skirt. We all got kickers. I'm sappy I never got kickers because I'm tall. I look like a Christy the Clown if I wore kickers. I'd be such an idiot. It'd be so out of proportion. I look like I have webbed feet all day every day. You slay a dolly tune. In year 10, I got fake Doc Martens because I was in my indie phase. We're getting a Doc Martens picture with Jake Buck. Oh my God. Hey, are you resurfaced? I'm like, having a picture with Jake Buck, he was high as a kite. High as a kite. But I was just so stupid and sick. I didn't have a clue though. I didn't know that people were on drugs at all. Maybe he's just really chilled. No. I think he's just got a great aura. Bye-bye. What is spice? Some, like, synthetic drug. Some hardcore shit. Do we smoke it, inject it, sniff it? I don't know what to do with it, but I know it, like, makes them a bit frozen. Oh. Do you remember in Manchester, whenever you'd go, there'd be, like, people curled up in a ball. Yeah. Oh, that's spice. I say. Yeah, anyway, digress. It's a bit inappropriate. You know what I mean? People like that at times. Do you know what I mean? We'll go back to the Jake Buck bit. You're such a pro. No, yeah, because I was just like... I'm going to get in trouble. Trouble. But no, yeah, I had no idea he was high as a kite. I posted it as my cover photo on Facebook. And it sat down like this. That was your cover photo and my cover photo was a picture of me in Chinese Buffet at... Whose birthday was it? I think it might have been mine. It was your birthday, but it snowed, as always. What a place, Chinese Buffet. And there was a wet floor sign that said, caution, wet floor. And I covered the floor and I led across the chair with it because I thought I was a comedic genius and so began my whole thing. We used to bring our cameras out and take pictures. I've got loads of pictures of you like that. You used to take photos like... Do you know what I find mental? I used to buy stuff from American Apparel and stuff. You were a tildian, aren't you? Did you just say it? You were wedged. I definitely was not. Aaron Prime, aren't he? Everyone was like, I really want this American Apparel dress. Everyone had it, didn't they? It was the halter neck one, wasn't it? I borrowed some ones and I loved it. The purple one. You cannot post those pictures of us in your garden. The outfits are atrocious. The makeup is horrendous. I was over-blushing before the blush thing came in. I'm literally so pale and I'm like so blushed and I've got my hair half up, half down. I think I was just putting concealer on as foundation and it was like shade 4. Do you know what we were talking about P.E. before? I used to literally get the Rimmel Stay Matte powder with a brush and I'd just lick this cake. So you'd come out of P.E. looking like you'd lost like 5 litres of blood. I was Bella. Where have you been, Luka? The skin of a killer, Bella. Your skin glistens. Not enough people understand Twilight humor. Me and Ellie always laugh about it. Oh and Lydia as well. There's so many funny TikToks now. People just I love the one of the wolves. The dancing wolf. I'm running to imprint. And it's that weird Russian donk song in it. So anyway, we met in high school. First day of high school. We got put in the same form. It was just bliss. Yeah, literally. She was the first friend I made. I remember walking down the stairs. We were in 7SH. Some fucking boy. Remember Chocolate Friday? We did a quiz on a Friday and got chocolate. That was such a good idea. He was such a good form tutor. He was dead nice. He was probably the best form we had, I think. 100%. I'm Miss Breslin. She was amazing. Oh, nah. Miss Mortrim. Oh no, she didn't like me. Did she not? I don't know. It's because me and Amelia used to get told off for makeup and stuff. So I think that's why. We bloody old that microphone. I don't know what to do with it. It's old it. Yeah, basically. The other day. Sorry. I really need to wait. I'm really sorry. Go away then. Go away. Stop it. Oh, I'm going to piss myself. Okay. Thanks to God. Fuck's sake, man. I might crop Miss Mortrim out. Yeah. Crop whatever you want. Whatever you want. I need to wait. Oh my God, my mascara's running from laughing. How have I got so much darkness under my eyes? I'll die now. Oh my God. No, I'm just going to put some powder on. I feel like I'm really interrupting and getting inside. We'll get through how we met and then we'll just wrap up. I don't know if we should start again with how we met. Okay. I feel like we've been talking about this for hours. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. 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I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I kind of said this before, I don't think it can. I don't know, like, I feel like I've luckily dodged these, like, situations. I have not. But like, but like, Mine have not been accidents. Like, it's one of those things, isn't it? Unless you've been through it. Like, to me, it was a case of finding it after we'd split up. So like, that wasn't like, I'd already, I was already gone. Checked out. So it was like, it wasn't necessarily like something I even had time to think about or forgive. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. But like, I don't know. I don't think, I don't think it's necessarily an accident. Don't get me wrong. You'd see. Because you're missing something to do it. An accident happens once. Yeah. An accident happens once. True. There have genuinely been times where someone has got pissed or done something. Yeah. And it's literally been an accident. Like, shit does happen like that. And I don't, I don't discount it. But the times where I have been cheated on. Yeah. They have not been accidents. They have been known things. Because they've got, they've been carried out over a long period of time. It's not been like one random freak incident. It's been like strategic, meeting up, speak, you know, sat with you on the couch and speaking to someone else. Do you know what I mean? That's what I mean. Like, that kind of cheating is like, no, that's planned. Yeah. Like, they're thinking about it. Obviously. So, and yeah, I don't know. I just think if, I don't know, like, but there's It's very cricket. It's like nights out and stuff. Like, why are you behaving like that to begin with at this age? Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Like, when you're like 16 to 21 or all that stuff. Go wild. I mean, like, not that it's excusable, but like You've got a lot less to lose, haven't you? Like, at that age. Yeah, you're still like, you're still finding your feet. You're still loving town every weekend. Do you know what I mean? You're still like I'll ask you the same question I asked Pip. Go on. Would you go back to level if you wouldn't get judged? Yeah. Just for like That's what I'm going to do. Build it me up. Just, just, just that one. That could be my third ticket in a launch party at bottom tier. Do you know what I would? Because, like, it's such a funny place. Isn't it? Like, I used to cry laughing every time I went because it was just such a funny place. We went once and we put the lights on in the morning. But it's so good. We've been there that long at 5am. I know. They turned the lights on. They shut the other floors. They were like, guys, leave. All the time. We came out and it was broad daylight. Yeah. And then I went back to Rose. All the time. Do you remember I made a cup of tea when you were asleep and I thought it was a normal tea bag and it was green tea. She put milk in it. Oh. No, it's not. Oh, no. You know what? I actually would, but like I don't know. I feel well old now in it. You're only 25. I feel like I'd be like 40. But the thing is, when I when my brother and your sisters were in the, like, early 20s they were still going home. I bumped into my sister in level once. They were still going. And she literally went she said, I sobered up straight away and got a taxi straight home. It was like, I'm not doing it. No. Honest to God. Oh, good times. No, I would go back. But like, it's one of those things, innit? But no, like, regarding cheating being an accident. I mean, like, when you're going out and you're getting that piss, like do you really want to be with someone who's acting like that anywhere on a night out? No. Because you're just never going to chill. No. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. You want to be able to, like, trust someone. You don't want to be, like, worrying about if they're going to get themselves in a state on a night out. Yeah. You're not babysitting your mum. No. You're not babysitting anyone. No. Not at this big old age. It's big for yourself. I know. But like you said, it's like, it's different. I mean, like, if it's an accident. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If it's planned and, like, do you know what I mean? Oh, God, yeah, it is different. It's completely different. I get why people, like, you know, it's hard to The hard thing is, as well, is, like, when someone tells you, it's like, you've only got their version. I know. Like, it's so, it's so, like, naive. Yeah. It's so naive. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 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