Anonymous confessions

In this podcast episode, Tiana reads anonymous confessions sent in by her Instagram followers. Some confessions include a brother accidentally breaking a dog's back, a granddad using a pajama top to clean his one-legged wife, a coworker having a secret relationship, snogging an ex, a sister attempting to harm her sibling, stealing wine from a teacher, and someone asking how long it would take for the police to find a body they killed. Tiana reacts to each confession and expresses shock and concern. She advises people to seek help if needed and concludes the episode. Hi, I'm Tiana, and you're listening to I Told No One About This, a podcast made by me. And today there are going to be no guests, so it's just going to be me talking to you guys and having fun. So in this episode, I put on my Instagram story for people to send in anonymous confessions to me that I'm going to be reacting to for you guys. And some of them are very juicy, so they're going to be anonymous, so you're not going to know who sent them in, just in case you might know them if you know me, but it's going to be fun. So we're just going to get straight into it. So the first confession is, one time my brother rolled off the sofa and broke my dog's back. Wow. So, oh my, that, so first of all, that is literally horrible. I want to know if the dog was okay after this. Because obviously the dog would have been in a lot of pain, that's literally horrible. Oh my God, I really hope that your brother didn't roll off with intent to hurt the dog, and I really hope he feels guilty. And also, I just want to know if the dog's okay, because that's literally horrible. Imagine how the dog feels, because the dog probably thinks that you've done that on purpose. Oh my God, right. That brother needs to sort himself out, because that is horrific. Oh my God, I feel so bad for the dog, guys. Oh my, poor dog. I wonder if it's still with us. Oh my God. Okay, so that was a horrible one. So that was really horrible. So we're just going to move on to the next one. Oh my, okay, so the next one. One time my granddad used my pyjama top to wipe my nan's pooey bum because she had one leg. That's disgusting. I was assuming that the nan couldn't get to the toilet with one leg, so went where she was. I'm not sure. But your granddad using your pyjama top to wipe your bum, that's disgusting. I hope you went in the bin after that, I hope you didn't keep it, because that's gross. And also, did your granddad not have any tissues if she knew, obviously if your granddad's taking after your nan because she had one leg, and she couldn't get to the toilet, surely you come prepared, so you don't have to use a pyjama top, unless he didn't notice. But that's still pretty disgusting. Oh my God. I didn't realise when I was planning this episode, the confessions were going to be so, like, gross. I thought it was going to be nice confessions, really juicy, but no, it's about animals and nans with one leg, so that's so disgusting. So the next one is, I have been sleeping with my co-worker who's four years older than me, and no one at work knew, but when they found out, we didn't talk again. So this is actually my co-worker who I work with, and I recently found out about this, and it took everyone by shock, because no one knew, because they acted so normal at work. And then, yeah, so, I mean, oh, you can't, surely that just makes you really awkward at work, so you can't be doing that, because you have to work with them, so no, you can't be doing that, you need to sort yourself out. Moving on swiftly, the next confession is, I snogged my ex a few weeks ago. Why? No! Move on! What are you doing with your life? No, you can't be doing that, oh my god, no, oh my god, that's, right, I want to know how this went down, though, like, you're still seeing him, you're not, what is going on to make that, what is going on to make that happen, and how are things now, because that's quite a random thing to do, why was you with them in the first place, oh, that's quite, oh, there was a follow-up, oh my god, there's a follow-up, so the follow-up is I haven't spoken to him since, oh wow, that's very awkward, and oh my god, I bet they're feeling quite guilty that they've done that, and then they haven't spoken to, oh, I feel really bad for them, because, oh my god, no, wow, okay, jeez, man, jesus, oh my god, okay, so we're going to move on again, so the next one is my sister tried to slit my throat with her nails after I hugged her, your sister's a psychopath, I think your sister needs mental help because she doesn't like affection that much, and she has to try and slit your throat, that's quite disgusting, you need to get out of there, no, do you live with your sister, like, oh no, that's not okay, you need to get your sister some help now, these are juicy, man, oh my god, okay, so the next confession is on results day I stole a bottle of wine out of Mr, I'm going to leave that blank, cupboard, oh no, I actually know this, um, I know the teacher who they're on about, they were my teacher, and they were leaving, so they probably got wine as a goodbye present, so that's, oh no, it's all bad for the teacher, because he was actually a really nice man, can't be stealing, and this was secondary school, so you're 16, stealing a bottle of wine out of the teacher's cupboard, no, that's not okay, I do feel really bad for the man, because he was such a nice guy, oh no, you can't be stealing wine out of the teacher's cupboard, that's not a one, so the next one isn't really a confession, but it's quite disturbing, so I'm going to share it with you, because I want to know what's going on in their life to make them write this, so it is, in your opinion, how long do you think it would take for the police to find a body you killed? So, one, why are you asking this? Do you have something to confess? Like, you should confess your anonymous confessions, not say, oh, also, I'm going to answer anyway, it depends where you hide the body, how well you hide the body, and how good the police are, I guess, I mean, look at Madeline McCann, she's still out there, probably body's long gone by now, okay, so I think I'm going to do one or two more confessions, because there are quite a lot, so I'm going to try and pick out, like, the most entertaining ones to react to, okay, so, one time I dropped a metal ladder on my younger cousin's head when I first met her, and now she fears me, she was four, oh, is this, oh, is the cousin okay? I'm assuming she got a concussion or something, oh, there's another bit, I hid it from my uncle, and he doesn't know, oh, and she did get a concussion, oh, no, what if she wasn't okay, like, if they had to go to the hospital, surely they'd have to know what happened, no, no, no, no, no, oh, wow, okay, okay, so, personally, I think I've saved this last confession to, the best confession to last, because I think this is quite a good one, because it is quite awkward, so I'll read it out to you now, I am talking to three of my co-workers, who all work in the same section of me at work, and they found out that I'm talking to each of them, what do I do? So, one, why are you talking to all three? Because, yeah, surely they're going to, they found out, so you didn't hide it that well, and they were clearly talking about it to each other, also, if you do like one of them more than the others, surely you have to like them all to be talking to them, but if you do like one of them more than the others, maybe just stick to them and not all the others, because you're going to get hurt, they're going to get hurt, and then you're going to end up with needing none of them, and they're all going to hate you, and you're going to have to work with them like that, wow, okay, so that is the end of the anonymous confessions, and I have to say, some of you guys' lives are weird, as I hope you all figure everything out, because some of them, you or your family needs help, um, yeah, I don't have anything to say about that, because that was actually quite shocking, but thank you for listening guys, I'm Tiana, and you've listened to I Told No One About This, bye!