JQ Memoir Draft

John, from Brooklyn, reflects on his upbringing and the influential figures in his life. His father and uncle, with contrasting personalities, taught him valuable lessons. Growing up in Brooklyn shaped his resilience. He purchased a car at 17 and had adventures in college. He traveled Europe with friends and eventually settled in New Jersey. He met his wife, Denise, and built a life together. His brother's marriage faced challenges, and they both became parents. Tragedy struck when his brother passed away and his niece was murdered. Seeking justice, he confronted the murderer. Amidst grief, his mother also passed away. John reflects on the fragility of life and cherishes family bonds. My name is John, and I hail from the vibrant borough of Brooklyn, New York. Born in 1965, I grew up in a household that blended the rich Italian heritage of my mother with the proud Irish roots of my father. Together with my older brother, we formed a tight-knit family unit. Throughout my childhood, I was fortunate to be surrounded by the warmth and love of my extended Italian family, who played an instrumental role in shaping my character. As I reflect on my upbringing, two figures stand out as my role models, my father and my uncle Chad, my mother's brother. These two individuals possessed contrasting personalities, providing me with diverse perspectives on life. My father was a calm and relaxed presence, while my uncle, having served in the Vietnam War, carried a deep-seated intensity and a volatile temper. Growing up in their presence allowed my brother and me to glean valuable lessons and embrace different ways of viewing the world. Uncle Chad, in particular, was a master storyteller, captivating listeners with his narratives. I inherited his gift for storytelling, a talent that often leaves people impressed with my ability to weave a tale. Brooklyn, with its vibrant streets and colorful characters, became my playground, a place where I encountered both triumphs and challenges. The neighborhood shaped me, instilling in me a sense of resilience and street smarts. It was not uncommon for me to find myself in fights from an early age, even experiencing my first scuffle on my very first day of kindergarten. Growing up in Brooklyn meant embracing the toughness and grit required to thrive in that environment. As I approached adulthood, I reached a significant milestone at the age of 17, purchasing my very own car. A sleek, black Dodge Challenger became my prized possession, providing me with a sense of freedom and adventure. While attending James Madison High School, first reveled in the camaraderie of my classmates and the excitement of the teenage years. My teen years, beginning in 1983 marked the end of one chapter and the beginning of another. The fall of 1983 ushered in a new phase of my life as I embarked on my college journey in upstate New York. It was within the hallowed halls of higher education that I crossed paths with Dave, a friend from a completely different background. Despite our differences, we quickly forged a deep bond, becoming inseparable best friends. Together, we embraced the adventures that college life had to offer, creating cherished memories that would last a lifetime. In 1985, a wave of wanderlust swept over my brother, Dave, and me, propelling us to embark on a grand adventure across Europe. We traversed the enchanting landscapes of England, France, and Italy, immersing ourselves in the vibrant cultures and captivating histories of these magnificent countries. The journey solidified our friendship further and sparked a lifelong passion for travel. Life took a turn in 1986 when my family made the decision to relocate to Hawthorne, New Jersey. It was during this period that I noticed a change in my mother. Once outgoing and sociable, she became more reserved and withdrawn in our new surroundings. The shift puzzled me, and I couldn't help but wonder about the factors that influenced her transformation. Regardless, our family adapted to the new environment, and my brother and I found solace in joining a karate school in Hawthorne, exploring our shared interest in martial arts. In 1989, our family moved once again, settling in South Brunswick, New Jersey. It was there that my brother and I achieved a significant milestone by attaining our first degree black belts. This accomplishment symbolized our dedication and perseverance, fueling a sense of pride within us both. However, the stability and unity that once defined our family faced a significant challenge in 1993 when my parents decided to end their marriage. The divorce deeply affected my brother, placing a strain on our once close-knit bond. Amidst this period of turmoil, fate intervened, introducing me to a remarkable woman named Denise. From the moment we met, I knew she was the one destined to be by my side. Just four months after our initial encounter, we became engaged, marking the beginning of a lifelong commitment filled with love and unwavering support. Simultaneously, my career in the stock market took flight as I embarked on a professional journey in Jersey City, New Jersey. Immersed in the dynamic world of finance, I embraced the challenges and opportunities presented to me, honing my skills and establishing myself in the industry. In 1994, Denise and I exchanged vows, sealing our union in marriage. With a renewed sense of purpose and determination, we made the decision to move back to Brooklyn, a place brimming with nostalgic memories and the promise of building a future together. In the same year, my brother also took the plunge into matrimony, albeit with someone whose troubled nature would cast a dark shadow over their relationship. Summer, his wife, proved to be an unpleasant presence, plagued by personal demons and a destructive relationship with drugs. The tumultuous nature of their union added strain to an already strained familial dynamic. In 1996, Denise and I embarked on a new chapter of our lives, purchasing our first home in Marlborough, New Jersey. It was a milestone filled with excitement and anticipation as we set out to create a haven for our growing family. Our journey into parenthood began in January 1997 with the arrival of our first child, Michael, filling our lives with immeasurable joy and love. In August 1999, our family expanded once again with the birth of our second child, Nikki. Finally, in October 2001, our cherished daughter, Danielle, graced our lives, completing our family and bringing an abundance of happiness. The birth of each child became a precious memory, etched forever as the three best days of my life. As our family blossomed, we embraced the opportunity to embark on exciting adventures together. Trips to various destinations, particularly those with sandy beaches and turquoise waters, became cherished traditions. From Florida to the idyllic islands of the Caribbean, we reveled in the simple pleasures of family togetherness, creating memories that would last a lifetime. Meanwhile, in December 1997, my brother experienced the joys of fatherhood as he welcomed his first child, Jeannie, into the world. This momentous occasion filled our hearts with joy, celebrating the arrival of a new generation. And in April 2001, my brother's family grew once more with the birth of their second child, Bobby, bringing further happiness and hope. As time went on, the demands of starting our own families led my brother and me down separate paths, causing a gradual drift between us. Seeking a fresh start, my brother made the decision to relocate to Florida with his new family, hoping to forge a new life in unfamiliar surroundings. However, fate had different plans in store, as their journey in Florida unfolded with a series of tumultuous events, including a messy divorce with Summer. In the end, my brother found himself with custody of both Jeannie and Bobby, shouldering the responsibility of raising them as a single father. The devastating blow of my brother's passing in February 2016 remains etched in my heart. Losing someone so close, someone I had admired and cherished throughout my life, left an indescribable void. His sudden departure shook me to the core, and not a day goes by that I don't think of him with a mixture of fondness and grief. Tragically, it was during this time of mourning that another heartbreaking chapter unfolded in our family's story. Jeannie and Bobby, my niece and nephew, made the difficult decision to move to Texas with their mother. Deep within me, I harbored concerns about this choice, knowing that their mother's influence might not be in their best interest. Little did I know that the consequences of their relocation would be far more devastating than I could have ever imagined. In the course of their time in Texas, Jeannie crossed paths with a man named Ricky Don Henderson, who would ultimately perpetrate a heinous act. In April 2017, Jeannie's life was tragically cut short, her young existence snuffed out by Henderson's brutal actions. The news of her murder shook our family to its core, and I, with a heavy heart, made the painful journey to Texas to attend her memorial. Standing in the presence of her lifeless body at the morgue, the harsh reality of her untimely demise struck me profoundly, leaving an indelible mark on my soul. The pursuit of justice for Jeannie's murder proved to be an arduous and elusive journey. Despite the overwhelming evidence against him, Ricky Don Henderson managed to evade arrest for her murder. However, he did face legal consequences for unrelated charges, leading to his incarceration in the county jail. Compelled by a mix of curiosity, anger, and a desire for closure, I visited Henderson multiple times, engaging in a twisted game of cat and mouse with a cold-blooded psychopath. The encounters were chilling, and I could sense the depths of his malevolence in his piercing gaze. Amidst the grieving process and the pursuit of justice for Jeannie, my family faced yet another heart-wrenching loss. In January 2021, my beloved mother passed away, leaving a profound void in our lives. In the wake of her departure, a sense of guilt washed over me as I reflected on my own impatience and shortcomings during her final days. I will forever carry the weight of regret for moments lost in the precious time that slipped through my fingers. The tapestry of my life is woven with joys, sorrows, and the enduring bonds of family. From the vibrant streets of Brooklyn to the tranquil landscapes of New Jersey and the devastating losses that have punctuated our journey, I have come to realize the fragility and preciousness of every moment. The lessons learned, the love shared, and the indomitable spirit forged within me continue to shape my path as I navigate the unpredictable terrain of life, holding dear the memories of those we have lost, cherishing the present, and embracing the hope that lies ahead. For more UN videos visit www.un.org