WRIT 144 Podcast - Identifying One’s Self: How Transgender People Choose Their Own Names

Transgender individuals often change their birth names, known as dead names, to better align with their gender identity. Choosing a new name is a personal and important decision, as it will be how they are referred to for the rest of their lives. Some people, like Kira's brother Aiden, choose a name that starts with the same letter as their dead name. Others may select names based on characters or celebrities they admire, family names, or names that reflect the gender they identify with. The chosen name can hold personal meaning and signify a step towards social transition. Each person's experience with their birth name and the methods used to change it are unique. My name is Kira, and it was the name given to me by my mom. I've always enjoyed being Kira. It just feels like it fits me. It matches my gender, and it matches who I am. This isn't the case for everyone, though. For many transgender people, their birth names, also called dead names, can be constricting, and not fit with who they are. Think of a name like a shirt, a gift given to you by your parents. For most people, the shirt fits fine, and nothing needs to change. But for some, the shirt doesn't fit now. So how do you fix it? Well, you pick a shirt for yourself, putting on something that actually does fit. But choosing your own name brings with it a little bit of gravity. I mean, you're choosing how you're going to be called for the rest of your life. How do you go about making this choice? Luckily, I have the answer, or at least one. I'd like to introduce my brother, a trans guy who changed his name. Aiden, how did you choose your name? So my dead name started with an A, and I wanted to keep a name that started with an A. So I basically just went on baby name websites, and I looked for boys' names that started with an A, and I eventually found Aiden. And why'd you change your name? I changed my name because it was a very feminine name, and I was starting to hate it, honestly. Not that there's anything wrong with that name. It was just very feminine, and in my mind, I was like, I don't want to be called this. I wanted a more masculine name. And Aiden, there are probably girls named Aiden, but it is traditionally a guy's name, and I wanted a name that was more masculine. So my brother's method isn't the only one used by trans people. Some take their names from characters or celebrities they like and admire, like actor Elliot Page naming himself after the main character from E.T., or writer Janet Mock naming herself after the singer Janet Jackson. Others could choose a family name, or a name that they would have had if they were born with their sex matching their gender. Punk musician Laura Jane Grace used both of these methods when choosing her name, Laura being the name her mother would have chosen if she had been born female, as well as being the name of her grandmother. Grace also went in a different direction than all the previous people I mentioned, because she changed her full name, getting Jane from her friend's daughter, and Grace from her mom's maiden name. Some trans people will change to overtly masculine or feminine names, some will change to more gender neutral names, and some will simply switch to a more masculine or feminine version of their dead name. Every trans person's experience with their birth name is unique, so the methods used to change it are too. Choosing your own name allows you to pick something with more personal meaning. It can bring you closer to your heritage, it can reflect your personality, or it can show who you want to become. In an article written for British Vogue, writer Erin Patterson, spelled E-R-I-N, views their name as a reward for experiencing the gender confusion that came with growing up trans, as well as a demand for respect, making sure that they are recognized as a trans person. For my brother, though, his experience with this name was different. My name means a lot to me, because as a trans person, it was like kind of the first step towards socially transitioning. Because when you first come out, people start calling you by your chosen name, if they accept you, of course. Like that's the first step. Before they start trying pronouns, it's like easier for people to try to call you by a different name. So it means a lot to me, because it was something that started, like it was the start of my social transition. And it was something that like I picked for myself, which makes it different. At least in my opinion, it makes it different than like a name that your parents gave you. I hope you learned something new about why and how trans people change their names. That's all for this episode. Thank you. Transcribed by https://otter.ai