SMALL TALK Vs. REAL TALK

The podcast episode discusses the difference between small talk and real talk in conversations. It emphasizes that small talk can be a necessary starting point, but it shouldn't be the only type of conversation we have. The host shares examples of both small talk and real talk moments, highlighting the importance of asking meaningful questions to break through surface-level conversations. The episode also touches on unspoken rules of friendship, such as not dating a friend's ex or prioritizing romantic relationships over friendships. The host provides tips on how to transition from small talk to real talk without making it awkward, including asking more interesting questions and being open and honest in our own responses. The episode concludes by encouraging listeners to share their own stories and to continue having deep and meaningful conversations. Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of Heard and Unfiltered, the podcast where we eavesdrop on life and spill the tea you didn't even know you needed. It's your girl Lilia and today we are diving into something we've all dealt with, or maybe it's never put to words, Moldox vs. Fiddletox. Where's the line? Yes, because let's be real, we've all had that moment where a conversation starts like how's your day and you're thinking, please don't make me talk about the weather again. But then we've also had moments where someone jumped straight into, so what's your greatest fear? And you're like, whoa, popped the brakes. Yeah, today we are spilling it all, why small talk isn't always bad and how it can keep us stuck and how to gradually break that gap due to the juicy, meaningful conversations we all secretly crave. And before we jump into the deep end, we'll do a quick recap of last week's unspoken rules of friendship, everybody, because let's be real, knowing the rules of friendship is key to figuring out when to keep it light and when to go all in. So grab your coffee, your tea, or let's be honest, your glass of wine, we're not judging, and let's get into it. All right, let's kick things off with a little recap of last week's episode. If you missed it, we spilled all the tea on the unspoken rules of friendship, rules that no one says are allowed, but we all live by, and trust me, the DMs we got, juicy. These rules pack so much drama. One listener messaged us and said, I overheard my best friend telling her co-worker she's been hooking up with my ex. The worst part is she told me to my face. She never got there. I mean, can you imagine the audacity? You're still in trust issues forever. If you're even thinking about dating your friend's ex, just stop. The friendship graveyard is already full of people who broke these rules. Yeah? Okay, let's not hit a nerve. I overheard a group at a cafe, and one girl was making like, every time I make plans with Mary, she cancels because her boyfriend suddenly wants to hang out. It's like I'm only her friend when she's single, and I felt that deep in my soul. It's one thing to reschedule every now and then, but if you're constantly dating your friends, you're basically saying you're not as important, and honestly, that hurts. So, this one got so many people in their feelings. One listener said, I was in the hospital for two weeks, and the only one friend who visited me was the one I barely talk to anymore. Meanwhile, my so-called bestie just sent me a get-well-soon text. You know what I mean? Bruh, dawg. That's a reality check right there. Friendships aren't just for the good times. Therefore, as they cry and need a hug, I just burned my life down moments too. If you're not showing up, what are you even doing? A person wrote down and said, I overheard a friend who borrowed, who lent money to their friend, and they've been trying to get it paid, but it seems like the other party's not ready to pay or return the money, and every time she tries to get the money, it becomes scandalous. I also got a comment from a friend, doing the thing, do not lend money to your friend. That's wrong. I leave that up to you, people. Okay, so those are just a few highlights. If you missed the episode, go back and catch up, and shout out to everyone who sent us their stories. We love hearing what you've heard in the wild. So, into the small talk versus the real talk, because let's be honest. Where's the lie? We all complain about small talk, but sometimes it's a necessary evil. Small talk is like the warm-up for a workout, if you're ever going for a workout or those warm-up you're doing for PE lessons. You don't love it, but it gets you ready for the real thing. But here's the thing. Some people never move past this. Like, are we really going to talk about the weather every single time we meet? You know what I mean? Like, um... Let's start with the classics, the weather convo. I've heard this as I was boarding, heading home the other day, and someone said, Yeah, it's so cold out here. It's so cold today, huh? And the other person was like, Yeah, it seems like fall is here. It's here. And that was it. The conversation died. Let's go basics. If you're stuck in this loop, try asking something like, What's the best thing that has happened to you this week? Trust me. People light up when you ask them something real. Okay. That hasn't ever had a small talk moment that turns into something unexpectedly deep. So, I was in the elevator with a coworker I barely know recently. And we started with the usual housework. But then I said, What's the biggest project you're working on right now? The next thing I know, he's telling me how he's traveling to Palawan to work and family life. It went from zero to real so fast. I'm not saying I don't love those moments. There are proofs that sometimes all it takes is the right question to break through the surface. You know what I mean? And on the flip side, Have you ever met someone who skips small talk entirely and goes straight into real talk? But like, for real. Okay, so I've had someone at a party say, Hi, I'm Rachel and I'm recovering from a huge mental breakdown. I look like a wolf. Let me hit you with your favorite drink. Just. Don't get me wrong, I love vulnerability. But timing is everything. Real talk is like seasoning. You need the right amount at the right time. You know what I mean? So how do we move from small talk to real talk without making it weird or awkward? Let's break it down. So one is, instead of the usual, how are you? Say something like, what's been the highlight of your day? Or what's something you're really excited about right now? People love these questions because they're fresh and interesting. People love these questions because they're fresh and meaningful. Another one. If you want real talk, you have to give real talk. Instead of saying, I'm fine. Try, honestly, today's been a little rough. They'd be surprised how quickly people open up and use this at all. Okay, and another one. Not every moment is meant for deep conversation. If someone feels distracted or closed off, keep it light. Send the real talk for another time. It's all about reading the room. Yeah? And that's a wrap on today's episode. Small talk versus real talk. Where's the line? Today we've given you some tools that make your conversations deeper, juicier, and way more interesting. And remember, small talk isn't the image. It's just the appetizer. The real logic happens when you take the lead into real talk. If you've loved this episode, share it with a friend who's still stuck in the weather chart cycle. And don't forget to DM us your story, the overheard story. 33433 Thanks for tuning in to Overheard and Unfeelsit. Until next time, keep the conversation unfeelsit and the vibe real. Bye-bye.