Baseball's Inside Journey 3

"Baseball's Inside Journey" is a podcast that focuses on youth baseball and helping players and parents improve their knowledge of the game. In this episode, the hosts interview Collin Henderson, a mental performance coach, CEO, and podcast host. They discuss the importance of training not only the body and skills, but also the mind in order to excel in sports. Collin emphasizes the need for awareness of where one's focus is and the impact of self-talk and language on performance. He also addresses the role of parents in creating a positive and supportive environment for their children, encouraging them to focus on effort and being a good teammate rather than just outcomes. The conversation highlights the importance of creating a safe space for kids to express their feelings and fears, and offers strategies for parents to help their children develop positive self-talk and mindset. Collin shares examples of successful athletes whose parents focused on effort and love for the game rather Welcome to Baseball's Inside Journey, the podcast that helps players and parents grow their baseball knowledge. This is the show that specializes in youth baseball. And now here's Coach Drew and Eric Powers. All right. Welcome back to Baseball's Inside Journey. What's up? I'm Eric Powers. I'm with Coach Drew. Hey, good to be here again. We're back. Yeah. And we got another special guest, man. I've seen this man work firsthand, Collin Henderson, big round of applause, Collin. Virtual clappery, kind of, sort of. But you helped our kids, Collin, actually when they were in All-Stars from the mental side. And not only is Collin a mental performance coach, he's a CEO and podcast host of Master Your Mindset, mental conditioning coach for colleges across the country, mental conditioning consultant. And, man, I thought you said, too, not only is he a Coug, which we love, Wazoo, but I thought I heard that, and I remember you saying that you worked with a certain quarterback we used to have with the Seahawks. Isn't that right? Yes. Well, if you follow the Hawks, you like Mr. Russell Wilson, both wins of any quarterback in the first 10 years of his career, won a Super Bowl. But yeah, he understands that there are three things you can train, your body, your craft, and your mind. And early in his career, that's been a huge, huge focus for him. But I think anybody looking at parents, coaches, athletes, a great baseline assessment. Think of me as a strength coach for your mindset, how emotionally, mentally fit, endurance, how you can adapt and be present. How much time do you spend on your body, getting stronger, faster? How much time do you spend on your craft or your skills? We're talking baseball, so hitting in the batting cage, doing long toss, pitching in a bullpen, fielding. But the third piece is your mindset, is your mind. I mean, going to the batting cage and hitting for three hours is not going to guarantee you're going to get hits. Structure on how to train to focus on the right things, use language and self-talk to be dialed in to when you picture the at-bat, is it you're picturing you're not failing or you're seeing this is the exact pitch that I want? Those skills can be trained. Colin, this is Coach Drew. One of the things that I've been focusing on this year for our 13U team, Eric's son is on the team as well, is specifically baseball IQ, where they're all talented hitters at this level. So going up there to the plate to be ready to hit, be looking for a certain pitch and know what you're going to do with it, and basically having a plan while you're up there. The one thing that I honestly am failing to do is, after now talking to you and hearing you, is also kind of help them get their mind right, accomplish what that plan is. How would you kind of try to implement something in there or help us to do that? I think the first thing, if I was coaching the mental game, is just awareness that there are three things you can train. And then what are you doing for those three buckets? Young performers would say, for the third bucket in the mental game, I'm doing nothing. So foundationally, I would ask any performer, where is your focus most of the time? It could be in the past, the present, or the future. So anytime you're on the baseball field, anytime you're doing a podcast or doing a test or meeting somebody in a new environment, you have to have that awareness of where is my focus? If I'm reliving, I'm looking at shame or your past mistakes or how you screwed up, and that's blocking your focus, if your mind is, don't screw up, what if I don't get a hit? What if I get a hit? Will I have other opportunities or how many followers am I going to get on TikTok or all this stuff? You're not in the present moment. When you're not in the present moment, you can't execute at the highest level. Mindfulness is the practice of awareness to be in the present without judgment. We need to learn how to not judge and overly beat ourselves up. I think, especially when you're on an all-star team, there's other good players there, and I got to speak to your kids a few years ago, and you're not in your own lane. You're constantly judging. What are they doing? How many hits do they have? I don't have any answer. Are they playing shortstop? Hang on. I'm not playing shortstop. So just train your mind to be here. What are some appropriate type of strategies for, say, maybe a 10-year-old as opposed to a 16-year-old or an 18-year-old because, obviously, mentally, they're at different places in their lives. What would you say to that? When is the right age to eat the right foods? When is the right age to be fit and exercise? You can teach these concepts to kids who are three and four years old. Your breath is always present. Being engaged in the moment is always very important. So it's just asking the questions and having some different systems as a family, as a team, just to practice your mind to be right here. No doubt. So we're focused on talking to parents, and they're really kind of our P1s of this podcast and trying to learn how to be involved with their child's life without overreaching but making the right impact. And you had a great saying, and I don't want to mess it up, but it's basically the car ride home after a game, whether it was good or bad. What should the parents be talking to with their kids? What should they say? How should they be involved, Colin? Yeah, and this is research from Bruce Brown, who's actually from the Northwest. He's done a lot of work in this area of helping parents have the right tools, and he actually surveyed student-athletes who are at a high level, and they said, well, what did your parents say to get you in the right frame of mind to love the game and to be engaged and to not feel that stress and pressure? And the irony is, there was research done by i9sports, 31% of youth athletes wish their parents weren't at their games. So that's one out of three of kids out there on the field, I wish my mom and dad wasn't here. I would ask parents, you know, is it ironic that your kids have the best games when you're not there? It's probably because they're, you know, without awareness, adding unwanted pressure and stress because they're hyper-analyzing every single game, every single play. Let's not forget, this is a game. These are not professionals. These are children. So when your child plays checkers, you analyze, why don't you make that move on that third, you know, whatever. It's like, no, you just go on to the next thing. So the best thing that Bruce Brown found is that to give your kids the great environment to thrive and to find the love from within, not because of you. So parents, the question is, do they play because it's your love or is it because of their love of the game? So these six words, every parent should just say these six words after the game. It's, I love to watch you play. And then you zip it. And a prime example is, grandparents are the best fans. Grandparents are the model because they do not hyper-analyze. They don't overpraise. They don't scold. They're just there with them and they're just happy to be there. Yeah. Gosh, that's powerful. That is powerful, man. Yeah. That is very powerful. And we forget that. It's true. It's true. And I always talk about parents' reactions even before, during, and after the game. And it's got to be one of our biggest topics. It is. And we actually haven't really addressed that topic too much or at least in too much detail in any of our previous episodes. But it's definitely something that's coming. We just want to make sure we handle that sensitive topic the right way. So that's really important. I understand. I understand. So here's another question. If I was doing a seminar for parents, I'd say, all right, parents, thank you for being here. So excited that, you know, I think you could not put together a scientist in a lab and create an environment that trains life skills better than sports. I actually think baseball is probably the best because there's so much failure. And there's ownership that each player has to have for themselves, but also it's a team game. But the question is, you know, how many coaches have your kids had in their career, in their young career? Think about it. Like camps and teams and training, it's 10, 15, 20, 50. I had one parent, 100 coaches. Like, yes, that's awesome. Okay, parents, how many coaches have you had to be the best parent you can be for your child? A fat zero. They're right. Like, gosh. Okay, so hold up. You want your kid to be coachable. You want your kid to have a growth mindset. You want your kid to, you know, take ownership of their role, but you're such a hypocrite. Like, what are you doing to look at the research-based, evidence-based things to create the right environment for the kid to have intrinsic drive, not because you're making them. Because the irony is, like, you want your kid to be great and to perform at a high level, but that can never sustain if it's coming from you. It just, it will never sustain. So you're actually robbing them from their joy. And the research shows that 70% of youth athletes quit sports by the age of 13. This is a travesty. Wow. Whoa. And you wonder why this is happening. I think there's a lot of things happening. But I think the first thing that I see, I think kids are associating shame and fear with a sport. Yeah. And they're attacking their identity and where they receive love from. 100%. So, you talked about this a little bit before, but when you see kind of examples of, you know, and we're not trying to get necessarily our kids, you know, to be playing MLB, but who knows? That's a dream of every child. And so, and I know of some parents, but reality wall, that's 0, 0, 0, 0, 0.1% of kids made the MLB. So my, my, more of my question is what have you seen or heard or understand through all of your teachings and knowledge of successful athletes that have made it? How did their parents help surround them with the right language and the right comfort and the right love? What's kind of that litmus test? Well, let's just look at the evidence. I'll talk about Mike Trout, highest paid player in baseball. Is he still the highest paid player? I think to this point he is. Yeah. Well, they asked his parents, you know, Mr. and Mrs. Trout, what'd you do for your, for Mike, young Mike growing up in the Northeast? It's really cool. It's very rare to see someone that successful in that part of the country. What'd you do to help him develop his skills, help his mindset? And his dad said, well, it was really simple. If Mike went 0 for 5 with 5 strikeouts or 5 for 5 on 5 home runs, we didn't care. All we would evaluate and talk about is how was your effort? Were you a good teammate? That's all we cared about. Wow. So, look at the evidence. I mean, very successful. And then Kobe, the Mamba, I mean, arguably one of the most ferocious competitors ever to don, you know, a court or a field. And Kobe was on a podcast, you know, obviously before he died tragically, and they said, you know, where did that Mamba mindset come from? Just a competitive, just almost an obsession with the game. And it really wasn't about, he wanted to win championships, but Kobe was obsessed with the game of basketball. And he said, well, my dad played in the NBA. He played in Europe. And when I was 11 years old, we moved back to the United States from Europe. And we're in Philadelphia. I was in a summer basketball league. And I didn't score one point. I didn't score a point. Never knew who my dad was. And it was embarrassing. And the last game, I was like, Kobe, just get one bucket so you don't have to, you know, leave this season just empty. Just get one bucket. He didn't score a point that game. And he's telling the story. After the game, you know, my head was down. I was dragging. I felt embarrassed. I let down my dad. I let down, you know, myself. I'm a fraud. Maybe I'm not a basketball player. And he said, in that moment, my life changed. Because how many parents put their self-image attached to how well their kid does or, you know, want it to be like or like socially, like how they want to feel with how their kid plays? He said, well, my dad changed my life. He put his arm around me. He said, Kobe, if you score 60 points or zero, it's not going to matter to me. I love you for you. It's not going to matter to me. And Kobe said, boom. And boom, in an instant, that mom of mine said was crazy. I wasn't afraid to fail. Yeah, well, that's perfect. I'm not afraid to fail. And so that whole offseason, he said that my whole plan was just, I'm going to work to get better. And going back to my favorite acronym, TBT, thoughts become things, Kobe's last game at the Lakers, he scored 60 points. Isn't that interesting? That's amazing. That's very interesting. It kind of almost gives you goosebumps. Yeah, it just did, actually. That's crazy, man. If you were to look at how we create confidence, research from Andrew Lane, he looked at where does confidence come from, BBC lab, and they found that self-talk was number one driver to create that energy to be confident. And we can re-condition, rewire some of these old thought patterns by using language as a tool. So just like you would pre-plan some of your outfits or you would go to the grocery store for the week and you would plan your meals, to start to re-condition and to quiet the noise, because a lot of times our thought life and our world and our brain is conditioned by what we're watching on TV, what we look at on Instagram, what people in our work environment are saying. Well, start to write down and pre-plan what should I focus on, what are some language and some words and some statements that are true that I want to give my mind to. So I would say if there's anything I could teach a kid or an adult or a pro-athlete or a college athlete or a sales professional or a CEO, is to not let your self-talk be random. It's to design. Design the language, because words fuel action. And the brain thinks in 4D. The first dimension are words or thoughts. The next dimension are pictures. So just by saying a word, it creates a picture that your brain sees. So if I say giraffe, or don't think of a giraffe. I mean, you thought of a giraffe. Or in-laws. If I say in-laws, you have a picture of, you know, but your words create pictures and pictures create feelings. It creates an emotion. So I think why are kids quitting sports? Because they're associating baseball or volleyball or fast-pitch or name it with pictures or experiences of their past that were not good and creates an emotion that's hurtful, harmful and they want to avoid and get out of it because it doesn't feel good. It's not fun. They are projecting that this experience will happen again. So I'm going to get out of here. And then the fourth dimension is it forms a belief. So, like I said, we need to, and I'm not a therapist. I'm a mindset coach. But there needs to be some unpacking. What are you associating fear about this thing that you're doing? Well, you just said just a little bit earlier, Colin, is that you talked about parents quite a bit. And hopefully, most of our listeners will be parents. And I hope that they can take something out of this as well. And so for your advice for those parents, other than just, you know, the talk on the ride home and some of those things, but how could they help their child get started and maybe even get themselves started on a journey to start having more positive, teaching their kid more positive self-talk and maybe even being looking within a little bit more and figure out what the message is they're giving their son or daughter? Yeah, well, our beliefs are not based off of truth, our perception of the truth. So let's start to help them recreate some truth about they are in a safe place. They can be themselves. They're allowed to fail. They can ask questions. They're allowed to take ownership for something because they want it, not because mom and dad are saying they can do it. But here's a few basic questions you can ask your kid. The first one is, why do you play? Have you ever asked your kids that, Drew and Eric? No, I have not. Why? Because in my mind, I think that it is almost self-answered and obvious. I'm probably wrong, but I'm just saying it feels like we're almost in the simpatico kind of like place where we're both speaking baseball language all the time and it's just like it's what we do. It is our release. It is our exercise. It is our camaraderie. It is our friendship. So I guess I assume he thinks the same way I do. But you're assuming. I am assuming. You're right. And maybe it's true, but why don't we guess? Stop being a mind reader. Allow them to own it for them and find different ways why they like it. Maybe you like it because you played with your dad as a kid. Maybe your kid likes the aspect socially. I have no idea. Maybe they admire my child or somebody else. I don't know. But it'd be good to just... And here's the other question I'll ask parents. If your kids were not in the room and they're with me and I'm their coach, I'm their mentor, I'm their safe place where we're learning the power of the mind, mindset work, and that's the third bucket we can train and two would be great. You got to have all three and this is the bucket we're going to train. And we asked about fear. What are you afraid of? When you make an error or you make a mistake, when you strike out, walk three hitters in a row, when you feel that thing in your stomach, what's the origin of that fear? What do you think kids most often will say knowing that you're not in the room and that what they tell me is completely safe? Parents. What my parents are going to think. I've surveyed hundreds of kids and no one answers parents. Do you think they would be honest with you and you ask them, okay, when you feel yucky inside and you feel worried and scared, what are you really afraid of? Do you think they would honestly give you an honest answer? Yeah, probably not. No. So I think we just need to recreate and this is bigger than baseball. This is bigger than a sport. This is like, are we creating an honest environment for our kids? They can talk to us where we're not too invasive in their private life. But a question for parents is what's more important, your relationship with your child or how good their batting average is? When you put it that way. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know. So I would say, you know, why do you play? What do you love about the game? You know, what creates warrior stress when you're out there? Like if you can just create a safe place where you can just get these things out there and there's not this like hidden scary thing, I think it just will just relieve so much tension and just stress. Once it gets out there, it's like, you know, the longer you wait, it has weight. It's just a thing. We're just holding on to these things that we're not aware of. And a question that parents need to reflect on, how long does it take your kid to be a kid when the game's over? Yeah. That's a great point. Say, Colin, of your five books and two journals that you've written, what would be the good place for parents to start? Maybe if they were going to purchase one of your books or maybe several of them, what would be the one that you would recommend based on the topics we're talking about today? I have a book for parents, you know, if you go to Amazon right now, Positive Parenting. It's a book. It's like 73 pages. It's the easiest book I've ever written. And it really was inspired by, you know, working. Early in my career, I mean, I would meet kids at Starbucks at 6 o'clock in the morning and it was all for free. I didn't get paid, but I was just pouring in and mentoring these kids because they were craving the stuff. Yeah. They weren't getting it in schools. They weren't getting it from their coach. They weren't getting it from their teachers or their parents are not mindset coaches. They don't know a lot of these terms. They look at something on Instagram and forward it to them. That's true. To me, it's like building the connection and having the conversations and just creating a place. I think everybody needs a community and a coach, no matter how old you are. And just giving some system structures. Yeah. I think if you're a parent, that would be a good place to start. I mean, you know, we have five kids. How do you name your favorite kid? Pretty tough. All the books will be pretty solid. That's the other question is, are parents doing their part to educate themselves on, you know, different things? Or getting into a parent small group and sharing best practices on ways we can create environments that are engaging, fun, but also challenge the right way. You know, what are the different resources? The fact that you guys brought me out to the All-Star thing and talked about mindset was pretty cool. Yeah. That was fun. I wasn't aware of it, honestly. But I thought, wow, this is such an important piece that, honestly, all these kids at this age and then going beyond Little League and into Travel Ball, Select Ball, these kids can all play. They all have shown an aptitude to be able to throw, catch, hit and do all those things. And I've always said one of the differences between guys that maybe don't go any further than 13U or maybe no further than 18U or guys that make it up to AAA but not the majors, the difference between all those different players a lot of times of what I hear also is their mindset. And are they able to make adjustments mentally? And those are things that I think is really powerful. And we try to teach the kids these things. But that's why I think this interview is so powerful for our listeners is because you bring a really unique angle to it. And it's not just about having an idea of what pitch is coming but also calming your mind, as you say, and make your thoughts become things. And I just love all those messages that you have. Well, and I think if I can leave you with a simple tool any parent can teach their child or as a family, and I'm guessing most of you drive your kids to games. They're not 16 yet, correct? Yeah. Yep. And that's a lot of community you have to practice within at least 10 minutes. Yeah. Oh, yeah. For sure. So here's a four-minute mindset workout that anybody can do. And I'll give you four steps. The first step is to just breathe. So to teach your kids, if you watch a major league game or a college game, most hitters before they take a step into the battle's rock, they take a slow breath. So I want you to watch TV this week and you'll see it almost every single time. So your breath is always left at the moment. Your breath is always here. That's called exhale. It tells your subconscious you're not in danger. And the interesting is that we know that elite focus is paramount. Elite focus in baseball, being here, locked in, dialed in. But most people don't train that. So just looking at your breath, feeling your breath in through your nose, out through your mouth, or just in through your nose, and take a few slow, calming breaths. It gets you calm. But then for a minute, the challenge is to think of nothing but just breathing. So bad thoughts are bad. Good thoughts are good. No thought is best. When you're not thinking, you're most optimizing yourself. Because sometimes good thoughts that there's an expectation or maybe some pressure is very outcome-based, where no thought is present moment-based. No thought is like process-based. And that is a skill that we can train. So if you did one-minute day of just breathing every day, you're going to start to train elite focus. And a thought may come and go. Don't judge the thought. Just come back to your breath. Love it. Wait. You mean to tell me the object of this drill is to think of nothing but just breathing? Yeah. That's the object of this drill, buddy. But a lot of kids can't do that. Yeah. No, there is. You mean sit still? Yeah. Put down my phone. How much time do you have with yourself in the outfield or at third base? And it's a long inning. What are you thinking about? Well, let's lock it in. Let's train how to be right here. There's too much data on mindfulness that is so healing. It's so good for grit and resilience. I don't know. We can train that. And then the next model is I call the HA method. It's an acronym. H-A-W. So minute one is just breathing. Find your breath. The bigger the moment, the bigger the breath. Just train that. Your breath is always here. The HA method is the agent I have. So it's I have, I am, I will. I have is just thoughts of gratitude. Is the game a have to or is this a get to? Do you focus on what you don't have or what you do have? Do you focus on all your faults or your shortcomings or do you give thanks for all the blessings you have? All the good stuff. Like what you see in the mirror. Are you giving yourself reasons why you're going to lose or reasons why you're going to win? So again, this is a training skill. And maybe I'll fill this, you know, listeners last year's question. Drew and Aaron, what percent of human thoughts are negative? Eighty percent. Someone's read the book. Yeah. It was from the Natural Science Foundation found that 80% of human thoughts are negative and 95% of human thoughts are reoccurring. Oh, wow. I didn't remember that part. So the brain is designed to survive, not thrive. It's designed to survey the environment, look for threats and dangers. The brain is a survival machine. It's designed to worry. It's designed to worry. If you're not worrying, the higher chance you'll be living is not high because you've got to look at tigers, lions, elks, threats. But like now we've shifted these threats physically to do I look cool? Do I look intelligent? Am I popular? Am I batting third today? And like your whole social structure is tied to your worth to what you think other people think. So we've got to override that brain's wiring for negativity. And gratitude lowers stress. There's just so much good data that lowers anxiety and depression. Duke actually found people who are optimistic and grateful win more in business and in sports. I mean, it's pretty good data on gratitude. Wow. So the next one. So we've got breathing and the ha method I have. The next one is I am. Those are two really short words. Maybe the two most powerful words you can say to start any sentence. I am. And then you just give yourself an inventory of a powerful self-talk, a positive self-talk that's rooted in truth. So it's what I call credible self-talk. You can just do affirmations that are not rooted in truth. That does nothing. Actually, research shows that affirmations that are not rooted in truth actually is worse for you. But go back to that. Okay, I have overcame some hard things. I have put in the work. I am ready for this. I have a great set of teammates and parents and group. I'm ready for this, man. Hey, just compete. Attack. Why not me? Let's get this. Like just start to train the language. Because again, words create pictures which create emotions and create beliefs. And these beliefs flow into our actions. Language is the wardrobe of our beliefs. So don't make this random. Have a plan because you're going to have time in between each bad. You're going to have time in between any. How are you going to talk to yourself? Is your self-talk going to be created by what just happened or what you just saw? No, you are disciplined, trained. I know the language I'm going to look at because you can only think about one thought at a time. If you don't feel that thought is unproductive, your brain will give you something negative to think about. Yep, 100% of that. So this is a trained skill that's elevating confidence. So then the last one, I will, is visualize what you want. What's great about using this in sport, I mean, this has been proven, you know, different countries, Russia, China, Korea, I mean, America's got a lot of studies. Everything happens twice, first in our mind, then in real life. The brain cannot tell the difference between what is real and what is imagined. So a lot of kids are in that car and they're thinking about, don't screw up. Don't strike out. What would happen if I make an error? So without knowing it, they are creating neural pathways of failure. And there's a great book called The Body Keeps the Score. Your cells are storing these images and you subconsciously act out what you think about. I told the story of Bill Buckner in 1986 World Series against the Mets. A ball went right through his leg and cost him the game. I remember that. I remember it really well. Yeah, but there's a video that surfaced on ESPN E60 years ago. Bill Buckner was interviewed on camera like 12 days before that game. And the reporter said, hey, talk about the World Series, what are your thoughts? And I'm just going to like verbatim, he said something like this. Yeah, the dreams are that you have success and win, but the nightmare is, I don't want to be the guy that the ball goes over to my leg and cost us the World Series. Sometimes these things happen, it's just fate. He literally said that. So, why would you say stupid stuff out loud, but why would you allow your mind to just go down these worst case scenarios and live in this fear state? So we need to override, but by conditioning, visualizing, experiencing how we want to show up. Great point. Thank you, Colin. Well, we got to have you back, man. And if you want to seek more of what Colin's doing from Quiet Mind to Master Your Mindset to Rise Journal and get on that email, then go to thecolin2lhenderson.com. Thanks, brother. Really appreciate your time. So the mission of my company, Master Your Mindset, is to transform lives and normalize mindset training. So just having this conversation, we're creating the dialogue and the discussion. So, thank you so much. So important. Yeah, really appreciate you having on, and maybe we could have you on again sometime. Sounds good. This has been a production of Baseball's Inside Journey, LLC. This podcast does not constitute advice or services and is primarily designed for educational purposes only. We encourage your feedback and topic ideas at facebook.com slash podcast dot baseball.