VOAA Ep 7_ LOVE. Val's Day Ed

The speaker talks about their love for Celine Dion and reminisces about Valentine's Day. They mention the hot weather and their activities on the day, including hugging their husband and taking their child to school. They then recall a past Valentine's Day where their husband was absent for most of the day, causing them to question his fidelity. They express their emotions to their mother-in-law and contemplate divorce. However, their marriage did not end, and they have been living happily since then. They mention that they did not do anything special for Valentine's Day this year. Hi, welcome back to the valentine episode of the voice of an angel, let's talk about love. So that song is let's talk about love by Celine Dion and it's one of the songs I used to love growing up because I used to be a fan of Celine Dion, I just loved the softness of her voice, the melodiousness of her songs and I'm an R&B fan, I'm a lover girl so, yep. So yeah, let's talk love, so it was valentines week, well it is valentines week, it was valentines and with all of the lovey-dovey in the air, I had to send a valentine message to my tribe. The weather's been stupidly hot, not complaining on my end, I mean I'm not complaining because I did complain about the hamatan-ish weather we had in January, the type that made my noses cold at the dawn and we'd cause some like health issues all around for most of us in the world. In Nigeria, Lagos precisely, I don't know if it happened everywhere because I hear that it rains in Patakas sometimes early in the year but that's not about it. So, it was valentines day on Wednesday, um what did you do, what did you do? Well, let me tell you what I did, I sat back and I reminisced on my life, stories coming. I hugged my husband in the morning, in the heat of the morning and you know, we both were sweating, we tried not to sleep too long because it was uncomfortable what we did hug and I said happy valentines day baby and he said happy valentines day to me. And then, um, yeah, my son had to go to school and they had this valentines day dress up in school so I had to take him to school, you know, dressing up in red and white or red with a touch of white, white with a touch of red, yada yada, these valentine color things. So, um, I took my kid to school, I came back home, I got to work, you know, I got to set up work and while I was working, I remembered, I remembered something that happened last year, 14th of February 2023 and then I looked to my husband and I said, do you remember what happened this time last year? I was not expecting him to remember because guys don't remember those things, you know, it all sounds like trouble, trouble to them so they tend to not remember. I do not know if they do it intentionally or not but they seem to have even a woman with a pregnancy brain remembers a lot better than a man with no pregnancy brain. Shot fire there. So, um, I remembered something that happened last year, February 14th. Let me tell you that story. My husband got up in the morning, this was the time where we had, if you were in Nigeria at that time, you know there was the introduction of the new Naira Note and that made money scarce for a bit so we had cash scarcity and he woke up in the morning, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, next thing he was out. This man was out since like almost 7 or maybe past 7 till about 11. So maybe he went out like that, I don't think too much about it, I'm like where is he going because he didn't say anything to me and I thought okay, maybe he wants to go get me a gift so let's just hold on to the good side of it. Then he goes, he stays for as long as that, he comes back, it was now very sunny, I think he came back almost at 12 because it was really super sunny, he was sweaty and he came in, he had a bath, he ate and next thing he was out again. So within like 12 to 2, he was out again. When he came back, I didn't see any gift in his hands and I'm like okay, is he trying to do a surprise? My husband is not like that, of a truth, he's not that much of a romantic person. He'd rather just tell you, oh we're going out or just buy you a gift take but to say oh we'll go all out to plan a surprise, well, maybe sometime in the future but we want to marry because I'm living this right now. He's not that kind of person. So he comes, blah, blah, blah, blah, he's out again and he's out till like 4, 5, 6pm and here I am, I'm furious, today is Valentine's Day for goodness sake. He hasn't even said happy Valentine's Day to me, he's not acknowledged me in this house, he's not done anything. In fact, I have to call my, my mother-in-law was around so I called her and I told her, please I need to talk to you. I told her that in tears because I was pained. Now one thing about me is when I express most of my emotions with tears, so whether it's anger, whether it's joy, whether it's happiness, whether it's pain, I will cry. After I cry then I will now think about how best to respond to it, so if I need to jump or if I need to pray or if I need to just, you know, how best to handle it, that's one thing about me. So I call my mother-in-law and I'm like, isn't the blind can see that I love this man. So I'm not understanding this attitude that he's giving me to stay. And okay, there's been some like background story, there's been some, there's been some friction prior to then but that day just caps it all off and some part of my mind, I'm trying not to say this but I really thought this guy went out to see another woman. I really thought he went out to see, maybe to see his baby girl, buy her a gift or something. It's funny now, laugh at me. It's funny now, we were so funny then. Because I was working and I was reminiscing about and I'm like, wow, my marriage almost ended one year ago. And when he came back, I lashed him. I didn't talk to him, I talked to the mom. I told her, oh, if I catch that girl. The other one was like, no, he's not like that. I will talk to him. He's not like that. But you know how you can't really vouch for your child that oh, he's faithful to his wife and stuff. You can't really, there's only so much. You'll be like, ah, the child I raised, the person I know, he will not move like that. But, you know, it's another old life happening to the man. So maybe, somewhere along the line, he lost his morals or something. She didn't say all of that. I'm just saying, like, you can see that disbelief in her face. Like, I don't believe that my child is doing this. But I'll talk to him because I know that this is bothering you. Ah, it escalated. It went really wild. It got to the point where, they actually even called my dad and wanted to see him. But, you know, because there was this cash scarcity, there was limited movement, you know, public transport was limited. And my dad was coming from a corridor with like the mainland, the Kedah axis. So it was a lot for him to go through. And what he said to my mother-in-law was, okay, let her give him some time, given that there's scarcity of cash and movement is limited or movements are limited, that he's going to find time to come and then we'll go through with that. Well, he never came. And my husband then came. I mean, come and talk to me. Well, he came to talk to me then. Tried to address everything. Tried to explain, you know, with evidence that he was out with some guys in the neighborhood. They were doing some party. But I was not having it. Honestly, because think about it now. You just get up in the morning, you get out of the house. So where did you go to? Well, he had to go look for cash. He had to go the way to GT Bank at Sheraton side. He had to go and look for cash and he needed cash because he had to do some certain things and he needed cash. So why didn't you say anything to me? I called you. You didn't pick my calls. You didn't text me. You didn't have the decency to say, oh, this is where I'm at. So this is what is happening. Then you come, you eat my food, you're out again. I mean, what did you want me to think? Right? What did you want me to think that, oh, it's today, Valentine's Day event was a Tuesday. So it's today, Tuesday, February 14th, Valentine's Day, and you decide to go and look for cash. You didn't look for cash yesterday. You didn't look for cash tomorrow. You didn't say, oh, later in the evening, I'm going to look for cash. It is early morning. And then you go, come and then you're out again. So he sent me pictures. Oh, the guys in the neighborhood where he used to gym, they had a party. So they call people together. Communicate. Hmm. What sets through this thing was, we talked about this over, what sets through it was communicate. You cannot be living with me, sharing my bed, under the same roof, and you're not communicating with me. What did you want me to think? I mean, if you were me, what would you think? You know, we talked about this and I'm just glad we resolved this. And ever since then, we've not really had any major clash. Okay. We've had one, but I'll talk about that some other time. But since then, there's been no like major crash. Then we hit rock bottom. The whole of February 2023, we hit a solid point in our marriage where it felt like there was no coming back from this. But you know that law in Nigeria where your marriage has to be two years before you can think of divorce. So our marriage was two years, June of last year, 2023. So it was not even in the books. I'm like, God, I can't deal with this. I want out. I want to get out. I want to leave. Like I can't be with a man that does not consider me a da-da-da. Oh, it would be me. Agenda. People have problems. But all said and done, my marriage did not end. And we've been living in bliss ever since. We had one funny altercation sometime in like September, October-ish. I'll talk about that in some other episode. But here we're talking about love. So, my marriage did not end. That's the bottom line. But it would happen. So, love. But this Valentine's Day, Harvey and I didn't do anything. We really did not do anything. I was working. He went to work. I think he went to work. He was home. But he was watching movies most of the time. It was really, really hot. Never tried to give us lies or... It just wasn't the same. I mean, you could not get that vibe in the air. I'm not a Valentine person to start with. That's a disclaimer. I'm not a Valentine person. Even from when I was single. I'm not... Okay, if my pattern is like that, I could buy you a gift. I'm like, hey, happy Valentine's and da-da-da-da. But I'm not that kind of person. I don't carry it on my head. I say, ah, Valentine's Day, let's do this and that. I'm a romantic person. I'm a romantic person. I'm a romantic. I like to think of myself like that. But I don't do those Valentine's Day thingies. It's just not my thing. I just don't fancy it, right? Because I believe that the concept of Valentine's has been ruined. And what we're celebrating is not what, from my understanding, is not what Valentine's Day was about. But, then again, who am I? I'm one person in a few to change the narrative of the world. So. Now, what is love? I think we hear people ask what is love a lot of the times. More than we hear people ask who is love. Why? Because I feel like we should be asking who is love, not what is love. So, love. Love is more than a feeling to start, I mean, to begin with. Love is definitely not a feeling. So the feeling of a butterfly feeling is one of the symptoms of love, but it is not love. I don't know if I'm making sense. Sore throat can be a symptom of malaria. Maybe. I don't know. I'm not a medical person, but sore throat is a symptom of infection. It is a symptom of infection, but it is not the infection. If that helps you better understand what I'm saying. Itchy body. Some people have itchy bodies. That's a symptom of an allergy. I get that when I bath with anything Moringa. I didn't know until I bathed with whatever Moringa. I really thought Moringa should be nice. I noticed that every time I bathed with that, I would scratch my body. Sometimes I'm having goosebumps. I will itch my body till I'm red. It's a symptom of allergy, but it is not the allergy. So, that tickly, tingly, butterfly feeling in your stomach, or maybe in your heart, in your head, when you think about someone that you love, that is not love. Read to me this. You love your siblings, don't you? But do you get that tingly, butterfly feeling when you're with them, or when you think about them? There is that wholeness when you think about them, like this person is mine. That bond. But it's not a butterfly feeling. That is love. Come with me to 1 Corinthians 13. That is the capital of love. That is the part of the Bible, of the Bible that talks about love. It doesn't say what love is. It says who love is. I'm going to be reading from verse 1. It's a long read, but I'll stop the talking in between. 1 Corinthians 13 from verse 1. Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, this is KJV version, and have not charity, charity here is love, I am become a sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and I understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could move mountains, and I have not charity, I am nothing. Mind you, charity is love. Charity is the way KJV calls love. Just another version. This is love. Verse 3. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profits me nothing. Let me explain. Canopy are the cabbage, right? Canopy are prophecy. Ah, if I give you prophecy, if I see for your life, and when they come to pass. Canopy, every mysterious thing that happens on the earth, Oye me, I understand it. Canopy, I have knowledge of everything that happens on the surface of the earth. Canopy, my faith is strong, that if I tell this button on my table to move, it will move. If I tell a mountain that is planted on the floor to move, it will move. My faith is strong. I am a Christian. But, think of it, I get all these things, and I don't get love. The Bible says, you are a tinkling cymbal, a sounding brass, and it profits you nothing. So what is this love that the Bible says, if I don't have, it profits me nothing. Verse 4. Charity suffers long and is kind. Charity envies not. Let me now read it like King James. Let me read it in English. Verse 4. Love suffers long. Long suffering. That's love. Love is kind. Love does not envy. Charity is not full of itself. Love is not full of itself. Love does not behave itself unseemly. Love does not think about itself. Love is not easily provoked. Love does not think evil. Ah, no. You cannot say you love somebody and you think evil about the person. Love does not rejoice in uniquity. Love rejoices in truth. Love bears all things and believes all things. Love never fails. Whether there be prophecies, they shall fail. Whether there be tongues, they shall cease. Whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. For we know in past and prophesy in past, yada, yada, yada. That's not the part I'm talking about. Now, go down to verse 13, where this is a letter from Apostle Paul to the Corinthians here. And in verse 13, it says, and now, and now abide faith, hope, and love. These three, but the greatest of these is love. Verse 4 and 5, or verse 4 to 7, has told us what love is, the characteristics of love. And then it goes further to say, the greatest of these is love. Now, these are the characteristics of love. That is what love is. Now, I'm scanning my Bible for the place in 1 John where it says God is love. Yeah? Okay, I found it. 1 John 4, 16. Let's take a step back to 15, where it says, Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwells in him, and he in God. Then in 16, it says, We have known and believed the love that God has to us. God is love. Simple sentence. And he that dwells in love dwells in God, and God in him. Mind you, 1 Corinthians, chapter 13, verses 4 through 7, has told us the characteristics of love. Again, 1 John 4, 16 tells us who God, who love is. And love is God. God is love. See, you cannot dwell in God and not have love. Love is patient, caring, love is kind, love is felt most when it's genuine. Love does not manipulate. As I said from the beginning, love is not that tingly butterfly feeling. Love is patient, kind, caring. To the uttermost, love is forbearing, love suffers non-suffering. And then God is love made by me. It goes further in 1 John 4, verse 17, it says, Hearing is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment. Because as he is, so are we in this world. If God is love, and we are children of God, then we are love. And that is our duty on earth, to radiate love. To show so much love. And by love I mean to show so much kindness, and patience, and long-suffering, and peace. And not rejoicing in iniquity, and living in peace with all men. That is love. That is our ultimate assignment. See, when the disciples asked Jesus Christ, what are the greatest commandments in the Bible? He said there are two. Love God. Love your neighbor as yourself. Those are the greatest commandments in the Bible. They tell commandments to live by. Jesus Christ himself. If you use the NKJV where the words of Christ are written in red, you will see that it is Jesus Christ that said so. That the greatest commandment is love. Love God. Love your neighbor as yourself. Not just love your neighbor, because if he is not asking you to go and be happy, what is the point of asking for your neighbor? He is saying that the way you carry yourself, no man will hurt himself. You will not hurt yourself. So don't hurt your neighbor. You will not rejoice when your neighbor is angry. You will not rejoice when something bad happens to you. Don't rejoice when something bad happens to your neighbor. That is how to love. And it is a commandment because God knows that it is not going to be easy. He commands us to do it. Make conscious efforts to do it. It is not going to happen by saying you have given your life to Christ. You think it is automatic. No darling. Love is not automatic. It is a conscious decision to do good unto your neighbor. To be kind unto everybody you come across. I am speaking to you including myself because I know that I fall sometimes on this. I don't need to have a relationship with you to be kind and good and patient. Apostle Paul makes us to understand again in 1 Corinthians 13. In verse 13 he says there is faith, there is hope and there is love. And the greatest of all of it is love. There is faith, there is hope, there is love. And the greatest is love. And Jesus Christ says the greatest commandment is love. Love God, love your neighbor. So you have celebrated Valentine's Day. You have spoken to people. You have had that siglifling. You have probably bought or received exchange gifts with people. In my office we did a gift exchange. Or we did share the love. Something we call share the love where you say something kind about a colleague you have paired. Say something kind about a colleague and give them a small accompanying gift. I shared chocolate for everybody that came to the office. And the day I was at the office I had someone give me a gift and I gave someone else a gift. We have done all of that. But if you do all of these and you don't know God. You don't know who the ultimate, who the love is in person. Because it is not a feeling again. I am portraying this point that love is not a feeling. Love is action. Love is a person. Love is a being. It is a fruit of the spirit. Love is God. God is love. Simple sentence. Fresh John. Fresh John 4.16. God is love. So I am going to give you an opportunity today. If you know love or you think you know love but you do not know God. Then you do not know love. So I am going to give you this opportunity. To come to the ultimate love. And be wrapped in the ultimate love of the Father. Because it is only then that you will know what love feels like and then you can give it out. You cannot pour from an empty cup. You cannot give what you don't have. And you say I love you but do you? Do you know what love is? Valentine's Day is more than just a day to go and fornicate and do bad things and share gifts and expect gifts from people. They don't owe you that. Love yourself. Love your God. Love your neighbour. That is how to share love. So if you are listening to this and maybe anything I have said within the last 26 minutes has resonated with you and you are like yes I want to know this love. Then say after me Lord Jesus I thank you for the gift of salvation. Thank you for loving me even in my reckless state. Thank you for looking out for me and for finding me. Thank you for coming after me and leaving the 99 behind. I confess you today as my Lord and Saviour. I accept you into my heart. Be the Lord of my life. Let your love radiate in me and through me. That people who see me may see the light of my Father. May see the light of God through me. For you do not light a candle and put it under a bushel. Lord Jesus I want to radiate love. But not love like the world sees it. Love like is your characteristic. Love like is your person. Thank you for loving me. I accept you again as my Lord and personal Saviour. And I boldly confess that Jesus is love. Thank you Holy Spirit for receiving these people into your fold. Thank you for this direction and for this word today. And we ask that Lord Jesus will not fall down the way. Your love will radiate in us and through us. And the world will know that you are love. And we will love honestly, unconditionally and cleanly. Thank you Abba for we pray in Jesus name. Congratulations if you have said that prayer. I really don't do this a lot. I think this is the very first time I am doing an altar call or something. I really don't. But yeah. I know the love of God. I have witnessed it. I started by sharing a story where my marriage almost ended. What's for the love of God. So I am welcoming you to the fold. We appreciate you. Thank you for being here. So, 30 minutes on the call. This is where I close this topic for today. Maybe listen to it some other time. Tell me what you think. Again, love is the greatest. Love is the greatest commandment. God is love. This is the voice of an angel. I speak to you again soon. This is the voice of an angel. Tschüss.