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we're baaack! Talking about focus today...
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we're baaack! Talking about focus today...
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we're baaack! Talking about focus today...
The Word of Mouth podcast is back with hosts Nate and Shelby discussing the importance of focus and choosing peace and joy in life. They talk about the distractions and challenges that come with living in this world, but emphasize the need to keep our focus on the prize and prioritize peace and joy over material things. They discuss the rapid-fire thoughts and demands that can overwhelm our minds, but also acknowledge that we have the power to stop and give our burdens to God, who can handle them better than we can. They emphasize the need to break free from the mindset of trying to figure everything out on our own and trust in God's ability to handle our challenges. Yes, welcome, welcome and welcome to Word of Mouth podcast, the reboot, the reboot. Yes. We're back. Nate and Shelby, man. We're back in the building. Oh my God. What a blessing it is to be back. It's the reboot. We're going to kick it off really, really good. Shelby, how you been? I'm going to talk to Shelby for a minute, y'all. I'm blessed and highly favored. That's what we're going to go. We're going to sing right now. That's the way it is. Blessed and highly favored. Shelby's blessed and highly. How are you? I'm going to say the same thing. I'm blessed and I'm highly. Cheater. I'm good. I'm good. All is well. It's been a while. It's been a while. Yeah. We haven't podcast in quite a bit. A hot minute. Yeah. We're going to get into it, y'all. Life with lifin'. Listen. Can we talk about that? Just right there. We should. Life with lifin'. Life. It's like lifin' in every aspect on every level. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. Life with lifin'. And I don't mean to complain, because I'm very blessed. I really am. No, I don't think that's a complaint. Life has been lifin'. I don't think it's a complaint. Like, it's for real. It is for real. It's for real, for real. If you live in this world, man, I promise you, life is lifin' on every aspect. Like, in every part of life, it's lifin'. Let's talk about it, though. I was talking to Shel earlier, and we were talking about focus, the word focus. And I think that sometimes we tend to forget that when we are going through this life, while it's lifin', that we have to focus on certain things. And in our focus, do understand that distractions are going to come out of nowhere, roadblocks, you name it. Yeah. Those things are just going to pop up. And so I think that it's very important for us to keep our focus on the prize. Now, what is the prize? I was going to say, what is the prize, Mr. Brown? What is the prize? The prize in your own personal life is that thing that you're trying to get to, whether it's peace, whether it's joy. Come on. Come on. All of the above? All of the above. I've decided to stay in the place of peace. And so while life is lifin'… Can I do that? Can you help? Can we? Let's do it. While life is lifin', let's just… Share a little. Yeah. Let's just stay there in peace, because when it's chaotic, it starts lifin' a little harder. And then, I don't know, for a lot of us, I don't want a life no more, because life is too hard. Oh. It's a little weird. It's a little weird. It's draining. Yes. Yes. That place of peace for me now is probably more important to me than receiving a paycheck. Like, I want peace over anything. Wow. I choose it. Paychecks are important. It is. Life be lifin' a lot more if you don't have a paycheck. That's so much of the truth. I still choose peace. I know we gotta go get it. I know. And stuff is there. However, if I have peace going to go get it, it makes it more valuable to me. The paycheck, I'm sorry. The paycheck is more valuable because I have peace to enjoy it. There was a time in my life. Stop preachin' right there. Real talk. There was a time in my life, man, that I went and got many, many paychecks, and I had no peace. Yeah. It wasn't beneficial for me. It was just life. Well, I think when you get in that mindset of chasing the almighty dollar, you do lose sight of the more important things. God said so. And everything goes kind of by the wayside, and then you wind up in a very not peaceful place. Yeah. Yeah. I've chose to choose. Chose to choose. Choosing? I have chosen. That part, you know how it goes. I choose peace every day. And because the way life, life. Life be lifin'. I'm just going to stay at a place of peace. So that's your focus. That is my focus. Joy, I tend to reach for that a little bit because I've noticed that happiness is temporary. Joy is eternal. Yes. And also joy gives me strength. And so in the place of peace, I do need strength. I noticed that I wasn't getting real strength from the gym. I'm preaching. It was for me. It was for me. But I noticed that strength wasn't coming fully because I had no joy. So now I'm understanding that there are times when I have to go get my joy too, and it has to be intentional. I can't just say, hey, joy is going to come when. So you have to make the decision, and then you have to make that decision over and over again until it becomes a habit. Yes. Because that's your focus. That is so good until it becomes a habit. That's called discipline. I have none of that. Well, that's what we're talking about today, focus, that it becomes a disciplined action every day. What shall do you focus on daily? Like your main focus when you wake up, what starts hitting your brain immediately? Well, every day when I wake up, I try and talk to the Lord first and try to remind the devil that when my feet hit the floor, he better start running. But after that, my focus is everywhere. It's like a shotgun spray. Oh, my God. Okay. Why do you think that is though? Because after you finish giving God glory, giving God praise, thanking him for just the day in itself, why do you think that is? Because my focus is taken off of him, and I'm looking at all the stuff that the world's throwing at me. So does it come quickly? Oh, rapid fire, man. So immediately after you come out of worship, there it is. Gee, where do you think that's coming from? Wow. Okay. I got it. I want to say that this is a conversation that is important for us that try to get that worship time with God. Like why are we immediately attacked in that way mentally and psychologically too? Like shouldn't we just kind of relax? Here's a scripture, Matthew chapter 11, verse 28 says, so my yoke is easy. Yes, my burden is light. And he asks us to take rest in that, knowing that he will handle what we carry. And we can definitely carry his load because his load is super light. So why are we still carrying that heavy load? Because we're flesh and we live in this world. Gotcha. And this world makes demands on us, like you've got to get this done before such and such. You've got to get online. You've got to handle this. You've got to talk to so-and-so, and you've got to make a decision over here. And then there's ten other decisions that come with that decision. And these bills need to be paid, and these people need to be paid. And you've got to follow this rule and that rule, and you didn't follow this rule. So now you've got to make up for it over here and talk to lawyer A and lawyer B and lawyer C. This is Shelby's brain right now. My God. Rapid fire. I got it. Now it makes sense. Okay. So when all of that happens, is there a place in there, and if I can ask you, is there a place in there where you just say, who's that? No, you know how you said women multitask? My brain just keeps multitasking. Now there will come a point where I will start to break, and then I'm like, okay, this is stupid, and I'm done. And it is what it is. That place isn't too late, is it? No, I don't think it's too late. Okay. It takes a while, though. Is it because you're so strong? Because some people stop after, like, the first three hits. Like, they're like, okay, you know what? This is stupid. I don't consider myself that strong. I mean, you handle some things. You just spoke about 70 things right there that my chest started hurting when you got to the third one. Don't be making me add CPR to the list. That's not okay. Don't be burdening me with your health problems. So when you take on all these things, like, how do you know that your breaking point is coming, or do you know? Well, there's some familiar feelings in it, because I've been there, done that. So, yeah, I mean, if it gets to a certain point, you can feel it's coming. But I just have a hard time relinquishing stuff. Do you have to wait to your breaking point, or can you just stop it? Oh, I could stop any time. But do I do that? No, I don't, because I live in my own head, and I think that I can figure everything out on my own. Now, that's probably about 80% of the United States, 80% of humans, because we live there. We live in our head so much. That's why I think that we need to talk about focus or focusing on us, because we stay there too long. But if we're focusing on us, then that would be where our focus is. You mean focusing on God? No, I think focusing actually on us where we can say, hey, you know what? I don't have to take on all of these. I can just stop, and I can take a breath, because I have word that tells me that he can handle this better than I can, that he can deal with this better than I can. I heard the old church. I grew up in a church where they sang a song, glory, glory, hallelujah, since I laid my burdens down. So if I lay this stuff down and I give it to him fully, that he can deal with it better than I can, and I can get some rest and try to reset for the following day or month or year or whatever it may have been. But why do we keep, as humans, taking on more stuff? That's just the nature of our society and our culture nowadays. You have to prove yourself by adding as much as you can to your list and being able to accomplish it all, even though you might be killing yourself. You said prove yourself? Yeah. To who? Everybody else. What? Keeping up with the Joneses is what it used to be called. Oh, my God. And you just read my mail. Wow. Because I feel like I have to. Hey, it's okay. I felt like I had to prove myself all my freaking life. Like, I had to prove that I was a man, that I can handle it. And I really don't have to. But you just said that our brains make us believe or human nature make us believe that we have to prove something. I don't want to prove anything no more. I'm too old. I know. I don't have to do it. With age comes wisdom. Yes. So, I don't want to prove anything no more. I've done it. Right. I know I can. I've been a man. Been there, done that. Yeah. So, I don't want to prove it anymore. I don't know. I think sometimes, though, when it's so ingrained in us, it's hard to come to that realization. Why? Am I proving something to myself? I think so. I just had that realization in my spirit as you said that. It's about proving our validity to ourselves. Wow. Proving our worth to ourselves. When my child was born, I felt like I had to become a better father than what I've seen. Mm-hmm. My child has grown. Why am I proving something to myself? I think I did a pretty good job. So, what am I proving? It's like I'm playing tricks on my own mind. If I'm proving it to myself, what am I proving? Yeah. I proved that I can work. I proved that I can love God. Mm-hmm. So, what am I proving to myself? If I am, am I tricking myself? Am I sending myself down this rabbit hole that has a- Never ending. Yeah. That's crazy. I'm telling you it was like a light bulb when you said proving something. Because other people I don't have to prove to anymore. No. And I don't say that because I'm not married, but I say that in a sense of I've done enough proving to people. So, what am I proving now just because? See, I think I'm still stuck in the proving to others too. Like I'm not just stuck in the proving it to myself. I'm just screwed. So, what do you think you have to prove to others? That I'm valuable. Okay. All right. So, value. I believe, personally, value comes from- Value is something that is created within. Value is innate. Yes. Thank you for that. I mean, humans can't put a value on another human. That's ridiculous. Exactly. When you're proving something to others and it equates to your value, what are you proving? How stupid are you? Oh, my God. I did not say that. She said it. I didn't. So, I guess the only way that we can come to grips with knowing that our worth and our value is, I mean, it's inevitable. A human life doesn't have a value. No, but I just had to label. Okay. Seriously, you need to get paid for this stuff we're doing here because what I'm trying to do is contradict all of the critique that I've had all my life. Wow. So, I'm trying to prove myself above and beyond all the critical voices that I've heard and prove to myself that I'm not what they said I was. Wow. Now, that is something that I think humans do every day. But that's what I'm trying to prove. I just had that aha. That's trauma. That is. That's major trauma because what they said… Drama is drama. That's my Facebook post tomorrow. Y'all go on my Facebook feed. You will see. Hey, you've got to give me credit for that one. That's good right there. I'm going to put her name right next to it. Trauma is drama. That is so true. So, you're saying that we are trying to or we've conjured up in our heads that we have to prove what was said about us. To be wrong. To be wrong. So that we are okay. So that we are okay. And what's the reward in that? Peace. Temporary peace. Hopefully not, but maybe. Okay. Because honestly, I mean, we really are better than what they said. Well, yeah, until you get to the actual place of knowing that you don't have to prove yourself, then it's temporary peace. Okay. So I had a teacher that told me that I wasn't going to be anything. I felt like I had to prove something to her when I got grown, but I didn't see her again. And sometimes I think about that. And so I guess I'm trying to prove to myself, okay, I just got it. So I'm trying to prove to myself that I'm better than what she said. She can be dead and gone. She could be. So what am I proving to myself? She left that seed. She planted that seed. So that's it. We've got to uproot. We've been watering and fertilizing. You're preaching. Come on. Filled it with our bullshit. Oh, my God. And we have let that thing grow so much, so much to where now it's not even the person no more. The person's been gone for years, right? Absolutely. We're feeding the seed. Thanks. Thanks for letting me know that I'm my own problem. Go out there and just water it. Hold on. I've got to get back to you. I've got to go water my seed. That is so good. How many people can honestly say that they do that every single day? I've got to prove to my parents that I'm gone. Or they probably said it, repented, and they're done with it, and we still holding on to it. I've got to prove to the previous relationship. I have to prove to... I have to prove to the little kids in sixth grade that picked me last because I was a fat kid. Oh, my God. That. See, stuff like that. How are we... What are we proving? They're not there. They're gone. It's over with. I still see some of them on Facebook. Oh, there it is. But, okay, so even if you do see them or they're still here, what are you proving? That you're not a fat kid? No, I guess not. I don't know. There's nothing to prove because it's long gone. Now, it sounds simple, but we've struggled with that. Those things have burned into you, though. Yeah, we've struggled with that. Yeah. And we struggle with it daily. And I'm really envious of people who can just be with that shit and walk away from it and be like, you know, whatever. I can't. I'm not built that way. I wish to God I was. I don't think, honestly, that a lot of people do that. You think they say that? I think it's a facade, yeah. Yeah, they put on the front in front of people, but, man, behind closed doors, they're probably sitting there crying. Like a baby. And there are times in my life where, like, I could give two shits less about what your opinion is of me. So it's weird. But that has to do with the maturity thing, though, too. Or can it determine who it came from? Well, and it also might be, like, in a particular aspect of life that I'm pretty settled in. You know what I mean? Like I'm pretty confident in. So, yeah, you can have an opinion, but that doesn't mean a damn good thing to me. Because it's just your opinion. Well, but I'm settled in where I am in that aspect, so I'm okay with it. Gotcha. Gotcha. You know, I have enough confidence in that area where I'm like, whatever. So why do we continue to water that thing that did hit home with us? Or did that seed went so far down in the dirt that it caused or started taking root? Why didn't we pluck it up? Because we didn't have the knowledge to do that. And after a while, it gets so grimy down in there. I agree. And I do think there's some comfort to holding on to that stuff. Because it's what you've always known. So what's the comfort in it? Do it help you become a greater person every day because you look at that thing and say, hey, I'm not that. Like I was told I wasn't going to be nothing. I'm not that. I don't know. I kind of think it's like a crutch. Hmm. Good or bad crutch? A bad one. Okay. I don't think it's a good one. Okay. Well, something that's said about us, we do use it as ammunition to become better. True. So if someone said, hey, you know, you're terrible. And you turn out or they see you years later and be like, you know what? I didn't really mean that because you're amazing. That stuff gives us. But they ain't really going to say that because people don't do that shit. Right. Of course not. But it do give us a sense of joy that they see something different. I'm really, really talking to me right now because I've. You've experienced that. I've experienced it, yes. Like there were even some relationships that went sour and then they saw me years later. And they were like, hey, you really wasn't a bad person because I guess they experienced bad. And they were like, oh, you really wasn't that person because I went through something worse. I don't know if it gave me joy or I don't know if I was happy that they went through it. I don't know. I don't know how I felt. I'm being honest. Yeah. However, I did let it go. I did. I had to let it go because for me, I would have stayed there and I would have dwelled upon that. And that would have became in my head a confidence type championship. And I would have stayed in that championship. Sometimes we stay in the victories too long. I'll say that again. Sometimes we stay in the victory too long. Like we'll stay in that place of someone telling you or giving you accolades and we'll remain there, yes. And that ego will turn into pride real quick. And you don't change from that. God rejects the proud but gives grace to the humble. That's your preaching. Now, he can tell you what the address is on that, but I can't. Yes, indeed. And I think that sometimes we ought to acknowledge the seed but don't let it take root. I can acknowledge it. I can acknowledge the fact that someone hurt me in my younger years, but I don't want it to continue to shape me today. Well, I think, you know, just thinking in my own life that when it was like if it was a childhood thing, you're not that person anymore. You haven't been that person in who knows how long, decades, you know. So why would that still hold true even if it was factual maybe at the time? That's a good question. Why would that still hold true? Right. Yeah. You're not that person anymore. Or are we? It's how we see ourselves. That's why the focus is so important because how do we see ourselves? Do you still see yourself as that little kid? Do you still see yourself as that teenager that did whatever? Do you still see yourself as that young man or that young woman that may have made that mistake? It's our focus. That's true. And I am going to open a practice. You side gig? Yeah, I'll be the side one. What is our focus? What should be the focus? The focus should be God's word and who you are in God and not who you are in this world because this world is going to lie to you every chance it gets. Come on. I'm preaching to myself again. Oh my God. This world is designed to keep us in a place of trying to prove something and we just keep scratching at it. But that's the system. It's a man-made system. It's a demonic system. I won't even say man-made because we didn't make it. Exactly. It's a demonic system that was put in place and designed for us to continue to fail. It's a hamster wheel. Shelby. And I'm tired of the cycle. Me too. Can I get off now? Please. Please. I'm tired of the cycle. I'm going to slow it down first so I don't get whooped up. Why should we be like this in two years, in five years, in ten years? I don't want to repeat this conversation in ten years. We're 16 years old. No fulfilling prophecy. No. I do not want to repeat this again. I don't want to relive this. Now I have changed from my 20s. I have changed from my 30s. There are some things that still kind of haunt me from those earlier years. However, I don't want to live there. I don't want to live there. Once again, what was Lot's wife told? Don't look back. And what happened? She went, what? What's back there? And then all of a sudden she was no more. That's a big word. I mean, that's a big word that we don't think about enough. God doesn't want us living in our past. Learn from it or you can run from it. What was that, Rafiki? It's in the past. It's in the past. Why do we choose that? Because it hurt us. It hurt us. And we want to feel like we need to be vindicated for that hurt. For the hurt? Yes. We should never have been hurt in the first place. Am I going to get some joy from it? No, but I think we think that if we could think our way around it, even though it's over and done with, we could have done this or we could have done that. And what does that do? It doesn't do anything. It doesn't change it. It's not changing anything. I'm not receiving peace. I'm not getting any joy from it. So what am I doing? Or we're trying to prove to ourselves that we weren't worthy of that treatment. We're trying to validate ourselves in that moment, go back to that place and say, well, I really wasn't worth it. I mean, I didn't deserve that. And maybe we're trying to talk ourselves into, well, if I had done this, I could have proven that I didn't deserve it. You know what I mean? Yeah. Trying to relive it and make it different. But it never makes it different. You can't go back and relive it. Can I make a, I don't know if this statement is going to cross. I don't know how it sounds, but humans be human. I don't even know if that makes sense. Let life be life. We have humanized humanness. What? I don't know. I'm listening to you, and we come up with our own solution of something, and it don't even make sense. It don't make sense. I look at people and a lot of social media, and I think how tragic we are. We're so tragic. Yeah. And things are so sad. I don't know. People are. People are? Yeah. Too peoply outside. Oh, my God. We're doing it to ourselves. It's funny, but it's sad. It's very sad. I look back over my life, and I've done some self-sabotage. You? I'm prime example number one. What are you talking about? I can self-fulfill a prophecy like that. Let me do it. You call me prophetic. Guess what? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah, we self-sabotage a lot, and honestly, we don't even have to. No, because the world does it for us. No. Literally, it paints the picture. It lays it out for us, and we literally walk over to it. And keeps us running on that wheel. No, but we need to get back to focus. If we focus on that, if we focus on the change we want to make, if we focus on peace, if we focus on joy, and create a habit, which I think you have to do. Discipline. Yeah, in order for it to come to fruition and to stick. And it's not easy, because I've been trying to do it. You know what I've learned? So from a personal training standpoint, I was talking to a dietician, and she was explaining to me that you can do something by habit, and it becomes repetition, that it turns into a traditional type of thing, and then nothing takes place. Let's say if you stop meat, you become a vegan. You're doing it. Your choice to do it was you wanted to lose weight. Once your body is set at a certain place, that's it. It plateaus. And after the plateau, that's it. So sometimes our... Discipline. It has to be disciplined. Discipline, discipline. That's so good. Oh, my God. Sometimes we do have to discipline our discipline. You have to switch it up a little bit. Yes, yes. There were times where I would... I think I told you this a while ago. On Wednesdays, I would challenge myself to lift so much more, but my discipline caught up to that disciplined thing. And so I said, okay, I'm not going to do Wednesdays. I'm going to switch it up on Friday. And then two weeks later, I'm going to switch it up on Tuesday because once you get to that place and you start doing it repetitiously, then it plateaus. It's the same thing with us in our lives, whether it's relationship, whether it's reading God's Word, whether it's someone's seed, whatever it is, if we don't switch it up, it's like Satan. He peeks into our future. And if we're doing the same thing over and over again, what is that called? You do the same thing. Expecting different results. That's insanity. Thank you. Because we're expecting... Here I am. I'm just kidding. We're expecting different results, but keep doing the same thing. Nothing's going to change. That's insanity. We have to discipline our discipline. I can't even discipline in the first place. So how am I going to discipline my discipline? You do have a level of discipline in your head because you fear God. So you have the level of discipline. We all do. It's a really wavy line. We all do. We all have a level of discipline. So now we have to take the extra step of disciplining that thing. That's kind of like... You know Mike Todd? Preacher Mike Todd? He was saying that the word for 2024 was strengthening your strength. God wants us to strengthen our strength, which usually you're supposed to be strengthening your areas of weakness. Right. That's like disciplining your discipline. Yeah, it is. That's really good. And I haven't heard that in no way, form. But if you look at just what he said, your weakness can't work against you if you strengthen your strength. There is no weakness. Because your strength now is the strength now that you had. It's more. Double. Yeah, it's double. Good. Thank you. Same thing with your discipline. Greater portion. There it is. So now we have to. And you have a level of discipline. You said every morning before you do anything. Well, not every morning, but I try. I'm being honest. She's just honest to a fault. I am to a fault. It's not a good thing all the time. But I can't help it. She's honest to a fault. And I love it because this is the platform where you just say it. It's probably four days a week. No, it's like 90. 90%. And that's a good thing. Hey, celebrate the 90. Some of us are just 20. But that level of discipline on the 90 can go to 95. And now we can look at those that are not at 90. We can look at our 20 and say, hey, if she can discipline her 90, I can discipline my 20. And jump it up to 40, hopefully. We're all blessings to each other. If we see one person that can do it, we know that we can do it too. That's how I look at the gym. Like if I see a guy and he got four or five slates on, you know, it's different from him to me. It's my competition in my head. I don't say that. It's a pitching contest. But anyway, it is. I promise you it is. However, from a discipline standpoint, even absorbing and allowing the word to work for us, we can do that in that area too. I want my peace to be disciplined more. I don't want it to be everywhere. I don't want to just have peace when I'm at home. I just want to have it. That part. That part. It shouldn't just be peace in just your home and then you've got to deal. Sometimes your home isn't even peaceful, which really sucks. Shelby, you're talking right now. That's a whole other level. That's life. Life be lifin'. Mm-hmm. We probably need to talk about that soon because if you don't have peace in your home, it's going to be hard to get peace anywhere else. I lived that for years. Really? Really? You weren't alone in that. God. However, peace? Yeah. Let's discipline our peace. Let's discipline our joy. That's a big sigh right there. That was the biggest sigh ever. I didn't know if she was going to let it out or hold it. Yeah, let's discipline our joy. Let's do it. Our joy should not be predicated upon what people say or what people do. Joy is within. But it's so hard because we live in this world. Well, that's why we have to determine the difference between happiness and joy. People produce happiness. Well, yeah, and like we talked earlier, if you can just count your blessings, if you just think about what you do have instead of what you don't have. You started this broadcast off and I said, hey, so how are you doing? You said, I'm blessed and highly favored. You said that about yourself. Right. And so that's not what people said. It's what you said. I was going to listen to my own being. There it is. No, I really am. But I get stuck in the negative. I get stuck looking at the stuff I have to do or we all do. Yeah, we all do. And so glad that it come across a platform like this, that people are not thinking that they are the only one. We can talk about it and say, hey, bro, I'm with you. I have those days where I'll be like, oh, God, what is happening? Yeah. But at the end of the day, can we encourage one another and say after the day? If I can, you can. Yeah. I think, though, that it requires a level of vulnerability and that instead of putting on the brave face in front of everyone and saying that everything's okay. You said the V word. Yes. Okay. I didn't know who was going there. But, I mean, honestly, like we live in this fake world where we're constantly putting on fake faces to make other people think that our life is just dandy. That's why we hide behind social media. Right. When really our tests are our testimonies and our, you know, trials. Yes. And our ministry is where we have suffered the most. Yes. Because you can't relate to someone if you haven't suffered the same things. Or minister to their hurt if you haven't been there yourself. Yes. I mean, it's just empty words when you do that. And people can read that. 100%. So, I think, you know, we can do that stuff, but we have to be real about things. Uh-huh. And, you know, it's not like we walk around saying, oh, my life sucks and this is, you know, crybaby whiner all the time. Uh-huh. But just be real. What is real? Israel is a country. Oh, my God. Good one. That was good. Where it all began. Okay. I got you. That was good. Good comeback. So, what is authenticity? Me. Yes, it is. Very authentic, very transparent. Again, you're truthful to a fault. I am. Sorry. You'll say it and think about it. I shouldn't have said that. Can I reel it back in? And it's already out. Rewind. But I love it. And also, as you just said, our tests are our testimonies. If someone can listen to you say, hey, I struggle here. I fell short here. I've done this and I didn't do it right here. Someone else is like, yeah, I did the same thing. And I was at a place of giving up. But you're talking about it. So, it must be something that me and you can relate. And now we can both get past this thing together. We don't come on this platform to say we're perfect. Oh, good Lord, I'm so far from it. No, I'm not. The east is from the west. I'm not even in the middle. You've got to see her eyes when she does that. Okay. So, with that, we cannot not have a testimony without going through a test. We have to. And we get it. And our test is to encourage one another after we either pass or fail. Because there are some tests that I did fail. Yeah. But it is to encourage one another. That's the focus for me. That's the focus. I agree. I feel like if I can be honest enough to tell someone, hey, it took a long time for me to live in peace. Living in peace for me, it comes from my mindset. It don't come from being on a boat out on the ocean. That's not peace, especially if your mind is everywhere. That's real talk. Hey, you can be out there by yourself and think that everything is quiet and peaceful. But if your mind ain't shut down, it ain't peaceful. Can I be honest? One year, I went to Miami. I'm in Miami with friends. I wasn't married. I'm in Miami with some friends. And I'm talking about everything that you can name was in this place at this beach. And I could not focus. I could not focus on anything that was around me. That's so in your head. My thoughts was I was so bombarded by everything else that even the friends that I was with, they were like, man. Where are you? Can you stay in a room? You're a party pooper. They called me something else. But it was like, man, we don't want to go with you because you're not there. So we think that if I go get on a boat, if I go to another country, if I isolate on an island, no matter what it is, if you're in your head. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Yeah. So it took years to figure this out. But I know now that my peace is not predicated upon going places or doing things or even at the end of a bottle or smoking at the end of a whatever may have you. It's something that you have to take a true, yeah, and grab that thing for real. Yeah, you have to practice it. You have to practice it. You have to perfect it. Yeah. And I suck at that. Honey, that's what we're talking about. We all. But even in that place of peace, I have to discipline the peace. And I think, OK, this is it. I have two great, great, awesome, awesome people, man, that I talk to. These ladies are just amazing in my life, man. And they tell me about this islandized type of mindset. And they think that because this islandized type of mindset, it causes me to isolate. I'm thinking that it's peace. However, it can also pull me away that there is no peace there, and it causes me to disconnect from everything. But I'm thinking it's peace. That's how my mind is playing tricks on me. I'm thinking it's peace, but I'm disconnecting. And so these two amazing ladies would say, hey, can't stay there long. I can see you. Because you've disconnected. It's OK to get the peace, but don't disconnect when you're trying to get peace. So your peace has to be disciplined, too. But just like me, you did a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you disconnect, you withdraw. And you were thinking the other person had withdrawn, but they really hadn't. And then you just created what you were thinking. Of course. Which we do. It wasn't discipline. It was something else. But we listen to hear what we want to hear instead of listening. Say that one more time. I'm so guilty of that. God. We don't listen. We hear what we want to hear instead of really listening. And I have to say that nowadays with all the stuff that we're distracted by, listening is really difficult. And our children are going to have such a hard time. And our children's children, I can't imagine, with all the technology and everything that's in their face all the time, 24-7, every second of the day, how they're going to be able to listen. Because I struggle with it. It's vital. And I can sit here and look you straight in the face, and you can tell me all kinds of stuff, and I'll go, uh-huh, yeah. And 30 seconds later, it's like studying for a test, and that is over and done with. One of the most. And I value you a lot. I mean, I'm just saying. You're right. I promise you you're right. I live in that place. For the last two, three years, I've made it very important for me to say this phrase all the time. It costs to pay attention. You say it a lot. A lot. The reason why is because now I understand I didn't pay attention. I didn't pay attention at all. I heard you. I didn't pay attention to it. So there's a difference between the two. You heard, but you weren't listening. Exactly. You know, to just give you a scripture behind that, in the book of Revelation, Jesus wrote, by way of John, Jesus wrote seven letters to the church. And at the end of each letter, he said, if you've got an ear, let them hear what the spirit is saying. Don't miss that. He didn't say, if you have an ear, just go ahead and do what you want to do and go off on your own thoughts. Let them hear what the spirit is saying. Pay attention. Right. Pay attention. Stop just hearing what you want to hear. Yeah, and I think that we listen to what we don't listen. We hear because we already have a response in our head, or we hear what the story is in our head. Like we've already, yeah, I know what they're going to tell me. Yep. We already know what you're going to say. And texting is even worse. That's a whole other conversation. Because there's no tone. There's no, I mean, you can get a tone for sure, and it's usually the wrong tone. Yeah. And it causes miscommunication. But there's no inference. Yeah. There's no vulnerability. That's your word. Sometimes there's a lot of vulnerability in a text. Really? Heck yeah. I mean. I send some vulnerable texts. What are you talking about? Because that's where I got the balls to say it. Pardon my verbiage. I try to send the most mundane texts I can, because I don't want you to even sense vulnerability. And maybe I'm different on that part, because if I show vulnerability in any kind of way, then I feel like I can be hurt. So I try to send all is well. Okay. Yeah, I know. I got those texts from you a couple months ago, and I knew exactly what was going on. You're going to call me out. You're going to call me out. There we go. Go back to the topic. But I'm the opposite. Like, I'll be extremely vulnerable in a text for the most part, because I don't want to be bawling in your face if I have to talk to you face to face. So a text is more vulnerable for you. Yeah, and also if I'm really pissed at you, then I can say things that I'm probably going to get pretty heated about. Yeah, and you won't say it face to face. I'm a keyboard warrior. You will say it face to face if you get. Oh, yeah, if you get me to that place. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I'm an internalizer. I know, analyzer, all that stuff. I'm just an iser, islandizer, analyzer. There it is. I'll let you think it all, and I'll be like, thanks. Mm-hmm. Have a good one. Very short. And it's sad because all those things can alter everything with another person or even in your own personal life because you're trying to figure out what's next. What are you going to do next? And that doesn't help in any kind of way. It doesn't help your next move because you're trying to figure it out. I'm really talking to me right now because the analyzing part of me is trying to make sense to it, and it's not making sense. Well, it's just like trying to figure out a problem so that you can get on the other side of it when it's not even a problem yet, and then you've made it a problem because you're trying to get to the other side of it. Why do we do that? It ain't even a problem yet. We're flesh, and we're screwed in our heads. It ain't even a problem yet. We're creating something that's not even there. Right. That's off focus. That's not right. It's because of something that happened in the past, though. Could be. That taught us we needed to be prepared because this is probably what's going to happen and this is what's going to go down. So if you don't want to be getting your tail kicked on that end of it, then you've got to figure your way around it now. Preparation. Wow. Preparation of what? Failure? To not fail or to not get your teeth kicked in on the other side. Oh, my God, teeth kicked in? Not physically, right? Well, I'd hope not. Good Lord, don't walk into that. But I got it. I got it. Okay. All right. So it all boils down to… And you don't want to be made a fool of either. That's the big one. Yeah. It's just like social media and being fake. I think that's what social media pretty much was made for, for you to be fake. Filters, hiding behind a screen, like all that stuff kind of puts… It takes away from authenticity to me. Yeah. And it creates an image of something. Standards that we're never going to achieve. Did you hear that? Yeah, what was that? I don't know. It creates an image of something, but it's not real, like a mirage. Okay, a mirage. And it's not real until you make it real. That's why focus is so important. What should we focus on that's actually real? You said it earlier. Let's focus on the kingdom. Let's focus on God's Word. Now, this is not saying for you to be super deep, super spiritual, walk around all the time and, you know, God said, God said, God said. No. Apply these principles to your life. Just walk them out. I think that will help in our focus. I mean, sometimes, just apply some principles. Like if we start doubting, we can look at some word and it says, hey, trust in the Lord with all your heart. Don't doubt. Lean not to your own understanding. Right. I mean, some of these principles do apply to our regular, normal lives. Well, and I think, like, I didn't mean to interrupt. Sorry. No, you're good. I think your focus can be stop picking stuff up after you've put it down, because I'm talking to myself here. Just leave it there. And when you want to start thinking about it again and rehashing it, leave it there. That has to be your focus is just stop it. I'll give you an address. Therefore, if any man be in Christ, second Corinthians. He is a new creation. That's it. Old things are passed away. So we just stop picking it up. Easier said than done. Just trying to apply these principles can help in our focus. And we have it. We literally have the stuff that's applicable to us. We just don't apply it. No, because we get so busy with busy. Busy with busyness. Boy, this woman is coming up with some phrases I love. Busy with busy. I love that. That's true. If the enemy can keep us busy, he can keep our eyes focused on the things of the world and not on the things that are eternal. The temporary things, didn't we talk about that before we started the podcast? Let's go ahead and read that scripture as we close the podcast. I gave her second Corinthians 4, 16 through 18. Now, this particular scripture talks about how we don't have to keep our focus on the things that are in the natural realm because that stuff is just a light affliction. Temporary. It's temporary. It will become dust. You ever fell off a bike when you were a kid and you got to scrape? No, because I never learned how to ride a bike. But anyway. I'm sorry. I fell off a horse a couple times. I got more than scraped on that one. Okay. She said I didn't learn how to ride a bike. Just being authentic. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen since what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal. It's eternal. That's probably something that we should apply every day to our life. If we stop focusing on that thing that we see every day, whether it's bad relationship, trauma in your past, your finances, your health, whatever it is that can trigger some type of negativity, let's take our focus off that. Because it is temporary. It really is temporary. It won't last always. It will change. You'll have a new one. A new bill. But we now have to put our focus on that thing that is in the unseen realm. Because I can see further down the way that joy is coming. I can see further down the way that peace is coming. So I don't want to stay here so long that I miss that. Stuck in the mire of today. That's it. I also think it's about living in the moment. And I keep saying that, to live in the moment, because we're not supposed to look back. We're not supposed to be a lot's wife and live in the past. And we don't know what the future holds. Live in the moment. Please. Can I say it? Live in the moment. Por favor. Live in the moment. Live in the moment. Focus on the moment. Right now. Yes. Just focus on right now. At this moment, whatever you're doing, just stop and say, God, I thank you. At this moment, stop what you're doing. Stop complaining. Stop thinking about what's going to happen. Trying to get around it. That's so true. If you focus on the moment, then you can't think about the past or the future. Or the future. You can't worry about the future. And you can't change the past. Change the past. Focus on right there. What did Rafiki say to Little Simba? He said a lot of things. It doesn't matter. It's in the past. It doesn't matter. It's in the past. You can't change it. You can't change it. You either run from it or you learn from it. Boom. So we thank you all. This is the reboot. I think we should go ahead and call it the reboot. OK. Yeah. We'll keep calling it the reboot. Because in the reboot, you don't know what's going to happen next week. We don't either. Right. We have no idea. So this is considerably called, a word of mouth, the reboot. With Aidan Sheldon, we're just going to do some things that are just going to surprise you. You may see a guest. You may hear a guest. You may see some video. You may just hear us singing. We do that. We do that in choir on Sundays. Yes. Yes. If you ever. Yeah. Amen. Nate's the king. No. Listen. He hates that. We are so thankful that you all listened to the podcast. Come back. The next one is going to be amazing. Again, you don't know what to expect because we don't know what to expect. Yeah. And if you follow us on YouTube, leave us some comments about subjects you'd like to hear. Please. Please. By all means. Thank you. We love you. We appreciate you. All right.